The Newsroom, Season 1

Maggie:
Happy Valentine's Day.

Jim:
Oh, wow. I didn't realize it was Valentine's Day. And that people in the office gave-

Maggie:
No, Valentine's Day is Monday, not today, and these aren't for you, they're from you.

Jim:
I am more confused than I was before.

Maggie:
Don planned a beautiful night for us on Monday.

Jim:
You and me?

Maggie:
Yes. Don planned a romantic evening for you and me. Me and HIM.

Jim:
That makes more sense.

Maggie:
And I don't want it to be ruined by Lisa, who will ruin it if she doesn't have a romantic Valentine's day. Last year her boyfriend forgot it was Valentine's Day and went to a Rangers game with his friends. She got drunk, made us watch "Overboard," and reviewed every bad Valentine's Day she's ever had, which was all of them. Not this year. You're gonna be like St. Valentine himself.

Jim:
St. Valentine actually-

Maggie:
Focus, nerd. Don got us a room at the Four Seasons.

Jim:
Me and...

Maggie:
Nope, still him and me. The Four Seasons. The bath fills up in less than 60 seconds. And I don't want Lisa showing up with a copy of "The Notebook" saying, "Where's the minibar?"

Jim:
Yeah, I can't hang out with Lisa on Valentine's Day. That's making a pretty strong statement.

Maggie:
Don't screw with me on this, James Tiberius Harper.

Jim:
That's not my middle name. You're thinking of Captain James Tiberius Kirk-

Maggie:
Do not screw me on this, Jim.

Jim:
We're not in a relationship. She calls me at night after work. We talk for a minute and then she says, "Should I come over?" And what am I supposed to say?

Gary:
You say yes.

Jim:
I say yes.

Maggie:
If you're dating someone on February 14th, you take them out on February 14th.

Jim:
What's February 14th? [Maggie is annoyed] Valentine's Day...

Maggie:
Yes.