Only Fools and Horses

Del:
(taking a smell of the "coffee" Albert just made) Hang about, which coffee did you make this with?

Albert:
That jar over there.

Del:
This ain't coffee! Smell it, it's bloody gravy.

Albert:
Yeah, that's gravy. Well it's not my fault. It's them jars, look. How am I supposed to tell the difference?

Del:
I'll tell you how you tell the difference. This one has on the label, Maxwell House coffee and on this one it says Oxo gravy granules. Bit of a giveaway really, innit?

Albert:
Well, I was in a hurry and I got mixed up.

Del:
I'll mix you up in a min...[realises] Hang on a minute. If you've made gravy in the coffee pot, then what are they pouring over their dinners in there? (goes to look) All right?

Audrey:
Wonderful.

Del:
(uneasy smile) Cushty. (to Albert) They're only doing it. They are only out there doing it now! They are only pouring Maxwell bleeding House over their lamb noisewats and veg. I don't believe you. Not only have you managed to sink every battleship and aircraft carrier that you've ever sailed on, but now you've gone and knackered a gravy boat!