Red Dwarf, Series II

Rimmer:
On the morning of Febuary the 26th, at 0800 hrs, did engage in conversation with second technician Rimmer, Arnold J...

Captain Hollister:
For crying out loud, Rimmer!

Rimmer:
- the outcome of which was a proposal by the aforementioned Lister to the aforementioned Rimmer to cook him breakfast.

Captain Hollister:
Okay, I'm getting the picture.

Rimmer:
Breakfast comprised of two eggs, three rashers of bacon, a grilled tomato, two sausages, a small portion of fried potatoes... and a large quantity of mushrooms. Having consumed this repast, second technician Rimmer, Arnold J. experienced what can only be described as a "voyage to trip-out city". To wit, a major hallucinogenic fit.

Captain Hollister:
Lister, is this true?

Lister:
No, sir. I'm sure it was only one egg.

Rimmer:
The aforementioned Rimmer, to wit, me, then attended inspection parade. He was totally naked except for a pair of mock-leather driving gloves and some blue swimming goggles. Under the influence of this psychadelic breakfast he went on to attack two senior officers, believing them to be giraffes who were armed and dangerous