Scrubs, Season 2

J.D. I decided to take Jamie out on a date.

Carla:
Who?

Turk:
You know, Tasty Coma Wife?

Elliot:
No way!

Dr. Cox:
Nice job there, Hooch. I tell you what: You give me some prep time, and I'll rig it so the husband can come with you. Honest to God, I'll have him sitting right next to you. Whaddaya say?

[In J.D.'s fantasy, Mr. Moyer appears from over his shoulder]

Mr. Moyer:
I'm free, and I love Italian.

J.D.:
You be quiet!

[cuts back to reality]

Carla:
I can't believe you, Bambi!

Turk:
She's so right, man.

Elliot:
What are you thinking?

Dr. Cox:
Oh, Rin Tin Tin Tin Tin...

J.D.:
SHUT UP, SHUT UP, SHUT UP AND SHUT UP, OK?! Who are you people to give me advice about anything?! All you do is just bitch about your relationships all day long! [to Dr. Cox] And you know what, glare all you want, big dog, okay? 'Cause I'm not afraid of you. [mimicking Cox] "Oh no! Jordan's only paying attention to the baby!" That must be so hard for "Dr. Look-At-Me", isn't it? "LOOK AT ME!" [to Turk and Carla] And you two? What, you're arguing since you got engaged? Wow, you're probably the first couple that's ever done that ever. It can't be that you're just scared, is it? [to Elliot] And you! Y-you know what, let's just - let's just forget for one second, that a month ago you told me you couldn't be in a relationship with anyone, because, for me, it's actually fun to watch you sabotage a relationship from the outside, it really is. [to everyone] Honestly, the only thing that gives me comfort, you guys, is that while I'm sitting at home, staring at the ceiling, just wishing that I had someone to talk to, is knowing that none of you idiots realize how lucky you are!

[He storms out. Laverne walks in]

Laverne:
Did I miss something good?