Stargate SG-1, Season 10

Dr. Jackson:
I got it! I made the connection! Sir Gawain to Gwalchmei. Culwhch and Olwen. Verus Gen Bree!

Lt. Colonel Carter:
[to Mitchell] And you say I'm hard to understand.

Dr. Jackson:
That's when it hit me: Sir Gawain.

Lt. Colonel Mitchell:
Wasn't he one of the Knights who say "Ni"?

Dr. Jackson:
Look, I know she's no angel. She's-she's lied, she's stolen, she's cheated, she's misrepresented herself, she's… lied.

Lt. Colonel Mitchell:
This place is deader than a Texas salad bar.

Vala:
["Studying" for her Psych evaluation] You are in the desert, you see a tortoise lying on its back in the hot sand. You recognize its plight but do nothing to help. Why? [pauses] Hmm. Why? Oh. [starts writing] Because you are also a tortoise.

Dr. Hutchison:
So, how are you feeling?

Vala:
[eagerly] Very well! Very well…well, you know, all things considered. Heh. I mean, you'd assume I'd be a prime candidate for acculturation difficulty, enduring feelings of…displacement and alienation. Perhaps even a little paranoid ideation. Hmm? But the truth is, I was able to adopt an abstract attitude which allowed me to…release some of my repressed feelings, ultimately providing me with a cathartic actualization. How are you feeling?

Dr. Hutchison:
I'm fine.

Teal'c:
Perhaps we should rest.

Lt. Colonel Mitchell:
[starts to sit down, then stands up again] No...that's a bad idea. And I'm starting regret staying up late to watch Deuce Biglaow: European Gigolo last night. Check that, I regretted it almost immediately.

[General Landry has just informed Vala that she has been accepted at the SGC]

Vala:
I-I'm a little… overwhelmed. Heh. But, as my first… official act, I'd like to report a rather disagreeable little man.

Richard Woolsey:
[entering, smugly] That would be me.

General Landry:
Mr. Woolsey's offer was part of the test. We wanted to make sure we could trust you.

Vala:
[recovering from surprise] I knew that. But were his sexual advances part of the test?

Richard Woolsey:
[horrified] What?! That's..ah…General, I-I can assure you…

Vala:
Well, I would've even considered playing along, but some of his requests were…well, a little…unusual, even for me.

[General Landry walks off, while SG-1 tries not to laugh]

Richard Woolsey:
General, I would never…General!

Vala:
See, I still think it's cause for celebration. So I say we go out, have lunch, and I'll pay.

Lt. Colonel Mitchell:
Pay with what, exactly?

Vala:
Well, Daniel will cover me until I get my share of the loot.

Dr. Jackson:
[exasperated] "Loot."

Vala:
Yeah, from all the treasures we're going to bring back from our off-world travels. What, I have to wait until I'm off probation before I start collecting?