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Two and a Half Men, Season 3

Two and a Half Men (2003-present) is a TV series original centered around a hip single bachelor whose lifestyle is interrupted when his newly separated brother and his son move in. more »

Jake:
Uncle Charlie?

Charlie:
Yeah, buddy.

Jake:
You know what'd be cool? If you and Rose got married.

Alan:
Yeah, Charlie, that would be cool! I could be the best man, carry the ring for you and the medication for her. Do pharmacies have bridal registries? Hey, have-- have you guys talked about having kids? Are we gonna hear the pitter-patter of teeny-weeny, crazy-ass feet? [to Jake]: No, he's not gonna marry Rose.

Jake:
Why not? He's already getting sex from her.

Charlie:
Jake, Jake, the only reason Rose was in my bed is because she was too tired to go home.

Jake:
Uncle Charlie, I'm an underachiever, not an idiot.

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