Veronica Mars, Season 2

Weevil:
This is pointless.

Beaver:
[sighs] Okay, look, so you know quadratic equations, right?

Weevil:
Do I look like someone who knows quadratic equations, huh?

Beaver:
I'm just trying to see what you already know.

Weevil:
Zero! You want your car fixed? Teach me.

Beaver:
Okay, okay. All right, look, so this equation right here, what do you think we should do first?

Weevil:
Am I a five-year-old girl, huh? Lay it out for me, dawg, c'mon! Make me understand.

Beaver:
Okay, okay! Okay, so let's say that you and your buddy wanna buy a 12-pack of a certain item, say, like, uh, spark plugs for "X" dollars, and you wanna find out how many of another item, like, um, I dunno, like oil, that you can get for the same amount. Except oil is "Y" times as much -

Weevil:
If this is your idea of terms I'll understand, I'm going to kill you. Or myself. It's a toss-up. Screw it, man. I'll just cheat.

Beaver:
No, look... but what about my car?

Weevil:
You know power buffers, right? Well, let's say your door panel is a summer home, right, and you need to clear out the south lawn to make a tennis court, so -

Mac:
[from next table over] F-O-I-L. That's all it is. First, Outside, Inside, Last. All algebra - it's just the formula.

Weevil:
Now can you teach me that?

Mac:
You'll still fix his car?

Weevil:
That's the deal.

Mac:
Okay, say you and your buddy buy a 12-pack of spark plugs... [Weevil glares] I'm just kidding.