The Young Ones, Series 2

Vicar:
What-ho, I'm the vicar.

Vyvyan:
Well you'd better be, or else you'd look right girlie in that dress.

Vicar:
[pokes Vyvyan in the eye] Right. Anyone tell the stiffie joke?

Vyvyan:
Yes. Rick has.

Vicar:
Yeah, well, forget about that then. Right. C'mon, let's get on with it, then. Let's get it over with. Oh, bloody hell. [As everyone takes their places around the open grave, the Vicar pulls out a small metal flask and starts slurping]

Rick:
Crikey, it's a bit early for that, isn't it?

Vicar:
My God, you're right! [drops the flask, spilling the contents, then pulls out a large whiskey bottle] Better get some of this down me before I have any of that, for starters. [takes a big gulp] Right, now, um, oh, yes! Ashes to ashes....

Rick:
[singing] Funk to funky, we know Major Tom's a junkie...

Vicar:
[grabs Rick by the collar] Shaddup! [headbutts Rick, causing him to fall into the grave]

Rick:
Help! I've just fallen into a grave!

Vyvyan:
Brilliant! Let's fill it in! [grabs the shovel from Neil]

Neil:
No! No! You can't bury Rick alive!

Vyvyan:
That's absolutely correct, Neil. We'll have to kill him first!