'Allo 'Allo!, Series 3

[Madame Fanny has been spending forged money in the hat shop]

Crabtree:
Good Moaning, I have come to arost your mither.

Yvette:
Arrest her mother? Why, what has she done?

Crabtree:
She has been pissing fudged bank notes in the hit shop.

Edith:
What does Crabtree say, Yvette?

Yvette:
I think he means "she has been passing forged bank notes in the hat shop.

Crabtree:
Presoasly

René (Dressed like Fanny, doing a poor impression of her):
Edith, remind him he is supposed to be on our side.

Crabtree:
Who is the ugly old bog in the bed beside your mother?

Fanny:
I have been asking the same question.

René (takes off his wig):
It is I, Rene.

Crabtree:
My Gid that was a god disgeese, I was complotely decieved by the wog.

René:
Edith, give him 500 francs from the till and tell him to pass off.

Crabtree:
There is no need to be rode.