Dharma & Greg, Season 2 (1998-1999)

Greg:
Pete, she's having a baby !

Pete:
Yeah but she's giving it to you !

Greg:
No, she's not !

Pete:
Hey how long after they have the kid do they keep making milk ?

Greg:
Seek professional help you are ill.

Greg:
We'll get her things and we'll go to the hospital.

Dharma:
Why she's not sick ?!

Greg:
Dharma, people have babies in hospitals

Dharma:
Yeah, I know isn't it horrible ?

Kitty:
You're not going to take this girl to a hospital ?

Aby:
Why, she's not sick !

Greg:
Mother, maybe you could give her a hand ?

Kitty:
Oh I don't know anything about childbirth !

Greg:
What do you mean, you had me ?

Kitty:
Oh Gregory don't be vulgar !

Greg:
Who are all this people ?

Abby:
Oh they're gonna help us with the baby.

Greg:
Why ?

Dharma:
Because it takes a village to raise a child Greg.

Greg:
It does ?

Kitty:
And, I realised that my true destiny was to be the matriarch of a large powerfull family. Like the Kennedys. But not catholic.

Dharma:
So why didn't you had a lot of kids ?

Kitty:
I couldn't have any more after Gregory

Dharma:
Oh really I'm sorry... Why ?

Kitty:
It hurt too bad.

Kitty:
Edward tell him.

Edward:
What happened to shut up and drive ?

Kitty:
Oh please ! You mean your gonna get my grandson drunk and perform a surgery on him in the living room ?

Abby:
You know, look frankly, Kitty I don't believe in circoncision either, but when it comes to penises Larry is very jewish.

Dharma:
Picture how incredible would have been high school if your mother had sat you down and taught you how to please a woman ?

Greg:
Thanks for that picture honey I may never have sexe again...

Greg:
Are you sure you're ok ?

Pete:
Yeah, I'm fine...

Greg:
What's going on with you and that girl, what's her name, Eileene ?

Pete:
There is no Eileen... I made her up

Greg:
But... You said you met her parents, and that they hated you ?

Pete:
They would have...

Jane:
What's new?

Pete:
My life is empty and has no meaning.

Jane:
I asked you what's new.

Larry:
Don't touch their money Dharma, it's a deal with the devil.

Kitty:
Are you calling us the devil ?

Larry:
You only want her elected so she'll wage war to support your military-industrial complex !

Greg:
San Francisco Board of Supervisors does not wage war...

Larry:
Of course not, they send the young boys ! Where have all the flowers gone, answer me that !

Ed:
You smoke them, Finklestein.