Homicide: Life on the Street, Season 6

Georgia Rae Mahoney:
Have we met?

Kellerman:
No, but I once had the pleasure of shooting your brother.

Bayliss:
Homicide, sweet Homicide.

Bayliss:
Give me Homicide or give me death.

Pembleton:
Where's Brodie?

Munch:
PBS aired his documentary. He won an Emmy.

Bayliss:
An Emmy? They give those things to anybody.

Bayliss:
Hey Gharty, who's house are you in? Frank here, has closed more cases than the two of you will in a lifetime.

Gharty:
This is his house? I'm a guest?

Munch:
Hey pal, where you from?

Scott Russell:
[an obvious New Yorker] Baltimore.

Kellerman:
Oh yeah?

Scott Russell:
Abso-freakin'-lutely. I love Baltimore. Eat crabs. Go, Orioles.

Munch:
That's not how we say it.

Kellerman:
It's 'Bawlmer,' hon. We lose the 't.'

Scott Russell:
Oh yeah, well lose this, pal.

Lewis:
I have danced with Junior before.

Stivers:
You partnering with Lewis?

Falsone:
Yeah, just started. Two days.

Stivers:
So, you sleep together a few times, and as soon as he goes to the john, and leaves his pants behind, you're in his wallet, checking the receipts, seeing where he's been and what he's done. Either you trust a man or you don't.

Falsone:
I was thinking about puttin' out one of those bikini calendars, you know, Cops of Baltimore.

Curtis:
What happened?

Falsone:
You see the cops in Baltimore?

Curtis:
You're right. Munch in a thong would be a little hard on the eyes.

Pembleton:
I told Lange I'd put our best detectives on it.

Lewis:
Don't try to back-door me with that "best" business, Frank. You ain't about compliments.

Gee:
What I'm saying is, this isn't Italy. When in Rome, do as the Romans do. When in Baltimore, do as I tell you to.

Bayliss:
I'm just speaking my mind here, Frank. I can do that with you because you are a man.

Pembleton:
Well, pretend I'm a woman. That way you can keep your thoughts to yourself.

[Lewis and Falsone check out a victim found hanging in a basement]

Falsone:
So it's a murder. Wow! A hanging murder.

Lewis:
A member of the Baltimore City Police Department, Homicide unit used the word 'Wow' on a crime scene?

Falsone:
You gotta admit it, Meldrick, it's a little different. I mean we get shootings and cuttings, cuttings and shootings, and every now and then some mope tries to pound someone to death with a baseball bat, but who goes to the trouble of trying to hang people nowadays?

[Dr. Cox comes onto the scene]

Dr. Cox:
Wow!

[Lewis and Falsone approach a group of kids consorting near a corner drug peddler.]

Lewis:
So remember kids: don't just say "no" to drugs, say "no, thank you"!

Lewis:
New rule. If we have a suspect in custody, it's murder. And if the suspect is unknown, it's the worst case of suicide I've ever seen. Huh? That's my new rule. I think it's going to make us all very happy.

Lewis:
She gonna be in my face; I'm gonna be in her face. Every step of the way.

Giardello:
Meldrick, in her face is one thing; breaking it's another.

Kellerman:
Enough with the metaphors.

Munch:
If not metaphors, what are we left with? We have a riddle, surrounded by a mystery, wrapped inside an enigma, and stuffed inside a body bag.

[At the scene of a priest's murder]

Ballard:
Heaven can wait. Homicide can't.

Pembleton:
You know, the thing about Baltimore is we're an easy-going town. You murder one Catholic priest, you've gotten our attention. But hey, you murder two, we take it personally.

Ballard:
My cat did it, my dog did it, the devil made me do it.

Gee:
Then check. If the devil is behind this, I want his ass in the box.

Pembleton:
Blind faith is the crutch of fools.

Munch:
The important point is that we win certain cases because our brains are repositories for intelligence and their brains are day-old banana pudding.

Munch:
Stupid killers are a gift from God.

Dr. Turner:
That's what the hospice movement is all about. Giving the patient a say in how they die.

Pembleton:
With dignity.

Dr. Turner:
You sound skeptical.

Pembleton:
I've seen a lot of death; haven't seen much dignity.

Munch:
Hey partner, ready to roll?

Kellerman:
Actually, I gotta run to the dentist; I cracked a filling.

Munch:
Which part do you hate the worst? The rubber dam they put in your mouth to open it, or the sound of the drill?

Kellerman:
I think the worst part is when I scream like a little girl.

Giardello:
Invite Dr. Turner in for a casual conversation and treat her with kid gloves.

Pembleton:
And if she declines?

Giardello:
A woman decline an invitation from you, Frank?

Dr. Turner:
What would you charge me with, if you could?

Pembleton:
How about playing God?

Dr. Turner:
God doesn't make house calls; you and I do.

Pembleton:
I don't play God.

Dr. Turner:
Well, that's what you do everyday. You decide who's innocent and who's guilty. You say - you - I'm gonna get you. But you - I'm gonna let you go.

Pembleton:
I avenge the dead.

Dr. Turner:
Is that why I'm here? Because you think you need to speak for my patients?

Pembleton:
Somebody's got to.

Dr. Turner:
Who the hell are you? You didn't hold their hands when they were screaming and hollering all night long. You didn't mop up any mucus or their diarrhea or their vomit. You didn't clean the pus out of anybody's sores, or throw your body across theirs to keep them in the bed when they were thrashing around in their death throes, with bile and blood gushing from every orifice. You didn't comfort their families who will never ever get over their loss. Detective, how dare you presume to speak for my patients?! They didn't need you then, and they sure as hell don't need you now.

Billie Lou Hatfield:
I come from a place where people think the moon landing was fake and pro wrestling is real.

Falsone:
You're not going to go for this Gee, are you?

Giardello:
At this stage in the game, I'd take help from that woman on Profiler. How quickly can we air the story?

Ballard:
We speak for the dead, remember?

Kellerman:
Screw the dead. What have their moldering asses ever done for me?

Pembleton:
You're not Manuel Rendares, are you?

Weeks:
Bernard Weeks. How the hell did y'all get onto me? I was so damn careful. I've been moving this kind of weight for 5 years and not so much as a traffic stop. Y'all DEA, right?

Bayliss:
No.

Weeks:
FBI, Customs?

Pembleton:
Nope.

Weeks:
Local narcotics. How long you been onto me? 6 months? Longer? You had to be on me for about a year, year and a half, to roll up on me with this kinda weight.

Pembleton:
Nah. We weren't looking for you.

Weeks:
Say what?

Pembleton:
We're not local narcotics.

Bayliss:
We're Baltimore Homicide. We're lookin for someone else. This is just a ...a mistake.

Weeks:
A mistake?

Pembleton:
Yeah.

Weeks:
You roll up on me with 200 kilograms and it's a mistake?!

Pembleton:
Well, you haven't by any chance killed anybody in Baltimore lately, have you?

Weeks:
No way.

Pembleton:
[exasperated] We just wasted another day.

Weeks:
[stunned] A mistake?

Bayliss:
Yeah. Sorry. Get him outta here.

Giardello:
My heroes.

Bayliss:
Well, that's what we are, Gee.

Giardello:
My drug warriors. (mock surprise) Oh my. Why, it's still red. In all this excitement, I didn't see this red name on the board here. Gaynor. Now how could I have forgotten this red name on the board?

Lewis:
Falsone, you got to relax, brother. C'mon, man.

Falsone:
Meldrick, are you whackin' these guys?

Lewis:
I'm a cop, Falsone.

Falsone:
I have to ask.

Lewis:
No, no. You ain't got-to-ask. You think I'm like them? You think I play by those rules?

Lewis:
It done folded just like you said it would, Gee.

Giardello:
Well, my words are my bond.

Lewis:
Yeah. Exactly how many favors you hafta call in on this one?

Giardello:
More than you'd ever want to know.

Gaffney:
Detective Lewis.

Lewis:
Captain.

Gaffney:
You look good in uniform, Lewis.

Lewis:
Why, thank you, sir.

Gaffney:
If it was up to me, you'd be back in a squad car for that stunt you pulled.

Lewis:
Yes sir.

Gaffney:
Course, your lieutenant here, he thinks otherwise, but I've always said Al's problem's a lack of discipline. If I was running his shift, I'd be offering you a transfer.

Lewis:
Respectfully speaking sir, if you were running his shift, I'd be taking it.

Bayliss:
What would it take for you to kill yourself?

Ballard:
A date with John Munch.

Bayliss:
If this case is such a legend, how come I don't know anything about it? I mean, I've been in this unit for 6 years now and I've never heard anyone say anything about Clara Sloane.

Pembleton:
Look, when you caught the Adena Watson case your first week in Homicide, and the case didn't go down, nobody had the heart to tell you about her, ok?

Pembleton:
You wish you'd stayed with the Sloane case?

Bayliss:
Yeah.

Pembleton:
Maybe it's good that you passed on it. You know, you started in, another dead little girl, nightmares....

Bayliss:
That wound is healed Frank.

Pembleton:
Why pull off the scab?

Pembleton:
Don't say a single word, Munch.

Munch:
What's to say?

Finnegan:
The guy give it up? You're coming from a box session, right? That ugly mope? He won't go?

Munch:
Suspect demanded to see an attorney.

Finnegan:
Oh, he does, does he? Did you give him a taste of the phonebook?

Munch:
Uh, we haven't hit anybody with a phonebook around here since '96.

Falsone:
What are you drinking? I've got you covered all night.

Finnegan:
That's very nice of you, bitch. Jameson's straight up. You know, when I was working murders, we used to drink across the street.

Munch:
The Waterfront?

Finnegan:
In my day, we wouldn't be caught dead in the Waterfront. I'll take you to a place where true police held court.

Munch:
Ouch.

Pembleton:
You think if somebody wanted to write a book about us?

Bayliss:
What, about you and me?

Pembleton:
The unit. Homicide detectives.

Bayliss:
Right. Fat chance.

Junior Bunk:
[to Lewis and Kellerman] Who do you think you all dealin' with, huh? Huh, I'm a man! I ain't no boy! A man! I'll do the twenty. I'll do the life. I don't care. So you all go ahead, send me straight to death row. Put the poison in my veins. But I'm done talkin'. You hear me? I'm telling your, your skinny white ass, and your sorry black ass, go ahead, ring me up, please. Do whatever it is you think you can do to me.

Kellerman:
[to Lewis, referring to Junior] Don't get too close; she bites. You might lose a finger.

Munch:
What the hell happened? I go across the street for a cocktail; I come back to the squadroom it's the Alamo.

Lewis:
Junior Bunk snatched a weapon out of Tambelli's desk. Gharty, Ballard, three uniforms got hit.

Giardello:
No recriminations, not yet. Not until we finish this. No one in the Mahoney organization sleeps tonight. We take everyone. We take every house, we kick in every door. Georgia Rae wanted a war, well guess what, she's got one. Now let's go.

Bayliss:
I'm glad we got out of the office. Smell was getting to me.

Pembleton:
I hadn't noticed.

Bayliss:
You didn't notice the smell? You didn't notice the blood and the powder residue? We're workin' right in the middle of a crime scene.

Pembleton:
I noticed, okay?

Bayliss:
I knew Keckham pretty well, from the mayor's detail. Decent guy.

Pembleton:
I worked with Charlie Moore in the Western. Same sector. He's a good man.

Bayliss:
You know something, I didn't see it. Didn't see it coming, didn't see him. And he's comin' in there and he's playin' all hard, but we get a lot of guys that come in there doin' that same thing, you know?

Pembleton:
You think we were supposed to know he was the one? That this punk, out of all the other punks who come through the squadroom, this one's goin' over the top? Please.

Bayliss:
Well, I'm runnin' around in my gun locker and I'm tryin' to get my backup gun cause my gun is in my desk. It's in the bottom left drawer. He's blowin' up the place, and my gun is sittin' down there; it's sittin' with the pencils, with the paper clips.

Pembleton:
Nobody was ready.

Bayliss:
Well, I'm ready now.

Pembleton:
Ready for what?

Bayliss:
Anything, Frank. Anyone.

Kellerman:
He had a gun! That is the truth! He had a gun. [lowers arm]

Pembleton:
The gun is down?

Kellerman:
He had a gun; he had it!

Falsone:
The gun is down. Mahoney lowered his gun. You fired. You were no longer in fear of iminent threat. You shot him down.

Pembleton:
Give me your badge, Mike.

Pembleton:
I have this one son of a bitch sighted. I have my gun up, and, I don't know. I don't. I blanked. I froze. I didn't even hear the shot. Next thing I know, Tim's layin' on the ground, lookin' up at me. Bleedin'. Because of me.

Mary:
Frank, don't do this. You didn't know this was gonna happen.

Pembleton:
Dear God, make Bayliss fight. God, please. I swear, I will do anything. Let him live. I'm askin'. I'm beggin'. Help my friend. I want him to live.

Giardello:
Frank.

Pembleton:
[throws badge on table] I'm done.

Giardello:
What?

Pembleton:
Bayliss is in there because of what? A partner who can't get him through safely to the end of the shift.

Giardello:
Look, this is not your fault.

Pembleton:
Yeah, it's mine. And I'll carry it. I gotta carry it. Bayliss is in there because of me. And you. And Lewis, Kellerman, and Stivers. All of it. But what is it? What is it really?

Giardello:
Frank.

Pembleton:
It's a lie. A damn lie. Now, maybe you can live with this lie, but, me, I just walked into the box with a man I served with. A fellow detective, Kellerman. I watched him turn to dirt. You told me to do it. I did it. Now you want me to look away. Live this lie. If I had listened to you...if I had just listened, I never woulda come back to the job. Then Tim, Tim is not layin' in that bed, with all those damn tubes stickin' out of him. I know that smell. Smells like death. I couldn't listen, could I? There's no truth for me anymore, not anymore. I can't be out on the street. I'm never goin' back in that box ever again. It's done. I'm finished.