Ninjago, Season 8: Sons of Garmadon

[Jay and Cole, in their new appearances, enter an ancient temple]

Jay:
Cole, you're my friend, but right now you're my worst enemy. You have no idea how time travel works.

Cole:
If someone goes back in time and alters the past, our reality as we know it would change. We could look totally different and not even know it.

Jay:
But we don't. Thus, Master Wu must have slipped into a time stream into the future.

Cole:
Whenever he is, it's been a year. It's time we find him. [walks up to a monk] Uh, hi. Sorry to bother you. Cole, Master of Earth. This is Jay, Master of Blabber.

Jay:
Lightning.

Cole:
We heard that an old man who lost his memory wandered in from the cold. About so high, long beard, drinks a lot of tea.

[The monk doesn't answer]

Jay:
I told you not to introduce yourself as the Master of Earth. No one knows what that means.

Cole:
No, you bolt head, everyone here took a vow of silence.

Jay:
[turns back to the monk] Can you point us to him? [the monk points] Thank you! I like your place! [he and Cole see a man] Wait, if it's him, and he lost his memory, don't remind him of that stupid TV show I once hosted, okay?

Cole:
Uh, Master Wu?

[The man turns around, but it's not Wu]

Jay:
Oh, come on, we came all this way, and it's not him? Aw, th-that's it. I quit.

Cole:
I'm tired of losing people in my life. Wu would never quit on us, and we're not quitting on him.

Jay:
If he's really still out there, couldn't he at least send a letter from the future, or leave a message to stand the test of time? He's wise. He'd find a way.

Cole:
We just have to keep looking.

Jay:
Yeah, you do that. And while you're at it, I'll be doing something more useful, like being a ninja.

Cole:
Ha! Some ninja you are. You talk more than you fight!

Jay:
At least I'm entertaining. All you do is judge and act like you know everything!

Monk:
Would you stop fighting?!

[Zane and Kai are fighting the Mechanic]

P.I.X.A.L.:
Zane, Master Lloyd requires Kai and your attention in Ninjago City.

Zane:
Is it serious?

P.I.X.A.L.:
It appears so. Did I catch you at a bad time?

Kai:
Zane, a little help?

Mechanic:
Hot off the press. The Mechanic is back, Ninjago.

Kai:
Ugh, whoever said "Fight fire with fire" didn't know what they're talking about.

Zane:
We will be there shortly.

Mechanic:
Watch out for the crossfire!

Kai:
Hey! You're stealing my lines!

Zane:
[freezes the Mechanic] Who likes ice cream? I do! How was that for a last line, Kai? Can we leave now?

Kai:
[also frozen] Needs a little work. Gonna have to give me a minute to thaw though. Heh.

[The ninja meet up]

Kai:
[sees Lloyd] Hey, there he is. You're late.

Zane:
Kai was late too, if it is any consolation.

Lloyd:
Thanks for meeting me here. It's been a while since we've all been under one roof. [Nya giggles and Cole nudges Jay] What?

Jay:
Are we gonna talk about it?

Lloyd:
Talk about what?

Cole:
Your voice, it's—

Zane:
[deep voice] Lower.

Kai:
Sounds like our little ninja's growing up.

Nya:
I don't like this one bit. If the Royal Family likes their privacy, why give such a public speech?

Jay:
I think it's nice. They're reaching out to the people.

Kai:
Why all the hate, sis? You just don't like getting gussied up.

Nya:
All that gold and glitter is for show. The Royal Family are figure heads. They don't have any real power, what purpose do they have?

Zane:
Their purpose is to be protected, as do all of our traditions. I believe Master Lloyd has spotted something of interest.

[They see Lloyd staring at the Princess]

Kai:
Looks like he's got an eye for the Princess.

Jay:
I guess green is her favorite color.

Lloyd:
You do know I can hear you, right?

Hutchins:
While you are in our service, you have full access to the complimentary royal buffet. Anything you want is at your disposal. Exotic fruits, assorted vegetables, scones, and all-you-can-eat cake.

Cole:
Ah, thank you, but I gave up sweets. My body is a temple.

Jay:
Ever since Master Wu went missing, Cole has been a real party pooper.

Zane:
[confused] Party pooper?

Jay:
I'll explain later.

Zane:
Can we discuss now what is a "party pooper"?

Cole:
Jay's upset I'm the responsible one. With Master Wu gone, someone has to keep us in check.

Zane:
In that case, you are correct. You are responsible. It is nice to have a pooper at the party.

[Jay laughs as Cole groans]

Harumi:
Forgive me, but is that... underwear?

Jay:
[takes the underwear and laughs awkwardly] We're usually more organized. But our leader got lost in a time stream... They're Cole's.

Cole:
They're blue!

Kai:
[laughs] You're lucky they're not yellow.

Luke Cunningham:
Ninja. Hmph. What do you two want?

Zane:
Luke Cunningham.

Cole:
Otherwise known as the Man in the White Mask.

Zane:
We would like some information regarding who you work for, Luke.

Luke:
Well, I'd like a pepperoni pizza and some chocolate ice cream, but it ain't gonna happen.

Cole:
We don't have that, but we do have a cup of hot tea that could warm you up.

Luke:
I ain't thirsty.

Cole:
[drinks tea] Mm, it really warms me up. Sometimes a cup of hot tea just hits the spot.

Luke:
Like I said, I ain't talkin'.

Cole:
Drink it!

Luke:
No!

Cole:
Oh, don't you get it? If you don't drink the Tea of Truth, we won't get answers! [realizes what he just said] Oh... [covers his mouth]

Luke:
[looks to his tea then to Cole] You trying to trick me?

Zane:
Cole, I think you drank the wrong cup!

Cole:
I see that now. [gives the Tea of Truth to Zane] But in full disclosure, I'm trying my best to look like I didn't. It's not working, isn't it?

Luke:
Ha! So you can't lie, huh? Oh! You pee in the swimming pool?

Cole:
Oh course! Who doesn't- [covers mouth]

Luke:
Heh! Where are you hiding the Princess?

Cole:
Oh, the Destiny's Bounty in a cove off Hollow's Bluff- [covers his mouth again] But tomorrow we'll be at the village of Stiix.

Zane:
You're giving away our secrets!

Cole:
I can't lie!

Luke:
What sort of power does the Green Ninja have?

Cole:
It's some kind of energy, or green light. I dunno, like, all our Elemental Powers rolled into one. Who can say? Zane! Knock me out! Do something!

Luke:
[laughs] Wait till the gang at Laughy's hears about this.

Zane:
"Laughy's"? You mean the karaoke club on the south side?

Luke:
[stops laughing] Oh...

Cole:
Haha! Who's the sucker now? Good thing I didn't tell him about my fear of singing. Oh, Zane, can we please get out of here?

Man:
[sees Lloyd] Oh, look, son! It's the Green Ninja!

Boy:
Is it? Where?

Man:
There! Look! [points but Lloyd is now gone]

Boy:
[unconvinced] Yeah, right, Dad, very funny.

[The baby starts crying]

Lloyd:
Maybe he's thirsty. Give him some milk.

Cole:
I tried. He doesn't like milk.

Jay:
What else do babies drink?

Kai:
Don't ask me, ask him.

Cole:
He's a baby! He hasn't learned how to talk yet.

Jay:
Oh, maybe he needs a diaper change.

Cole:
Oh, my gosh, do we even have diapers?

Lloyd:
Why would we have diapers? We're ninja.

Jay:
Ooh, maybe we can use one of our hoods instead.

Kai:
Not my hood.

Lloyd:
We'll draw straws. Loser gives up their hood.

Harumi:
[singing to the baby] The spider's in the house, sleep sleep. The spider bit the mouse, sleep deep. Don't wake up or else you'll find a spider in your mouth.

[The baby stops crying and falls asleep]

Cole:
Wow, you're really good at that.

Harumi:
Nah, he's just tired. Too much excitement. He'll go to sleep now.

Jay:
[trying to catch a meatball with a fork] Haha, come here, you little sucker! [accidentally stabs Kai]

Kai:
[yelps in pain] Aah!

Jay:
[gasps] Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to—

Kai:
[stops Jay from removing the fork from his hand] Don't! Just don't.

P.I.X.A.L.:
Proximity alarm. Something is approaching the Bounty fast.

Nya:
Onscreen.

P.I.X.A.L.:
It is Samurai X.

Cole:
Oh. He must be here to help us out.

P.I.X.A.L.:
I'm afraid that is unlikely.

Lloyd:
Why?

P.I.X.A.L.:
Because my system is overrun.

Kai:
You're making no sense, P.I.X.A.L.. What are you talking about?

P.I.X.A.L.:
This would be a good time to make a minor confession… I am Samurai X.

Kai:
What? Are you serious?

Nya:
How is that possible?

Lloyd:
How can you be Samurai X?

Jay:
Totally called it!

Cole:
You did not!

Jay:
Did too!

[Lloyd jumps off the Bounty and lands on the Samurai X Mech]

Jay:
He did not just—

Kai:
He just did!

Harumi:
We're... we're... we're gonna—

Lloyd:
Look at me! We're gonna get outta this! You hear me? [frees her from the Mech]

Harumi:
The map! Maybe we can use it to parachute down!

Lloyd:
What is this, a cartoon? That's never gonna work!

P.I.X.A.L.:
Zane, may I ask you something?

Zane:
You have half my heart. You can ask me anything.

P.I.X.A.L.:
Was I more... useful... inside the computer?

Zane:
What sort of question is that?

P.I.X.A.L.:
You can be honest with me, because I want to be a useful member of the team, but I would prefer not to return to the computer. I like having a body, but if you require my assistance in your headset-

Zane:
The choice has always been yours, P.I.X.A.L.. And I for one like seeing you like this.

Jay:
[sees the baby] Cole? Hehe. I thought you put the baby down for a nap.

Cole:
You mean little Cole Jr.? I did, but he was pretty restless.

Jay:
Uh-huh. Yeah. Then why is little Cole Jr. standing in front of me and passing me the pliers?

Cole:
Uh... Cole Jr. is walking now? I don't know much about babies, but are babies supposed to walk?

Kai:
No. No, they are not. And I don't think they know what pliers are. [the baby blows on a cup of tea to cool it, then drinks it] And they definitely can't do that.

Jay:
Okay, now I've seen it all. Now I really quit.

Baby:
Ninja never quit. [laughs]

[The ninja stare in shock]

Jay:
Uh, guys, I don't think that's Cole Jr., that's Master Wu!

Ultra Violet:
Oh, now isn't this a lovely pickle?

Kai:
Where's Lloyd?

Harumi:
The Green Ninja can't help you now.

Nya:
Remember how I didn't care for her at first? Then she won me over with all that girl talk, and we started to really get to know each other? Well, now I hate her!

[Mr. E brings out his mask]

Zane:
Don't even think about it.

Kai:
This can end one of two ways: either you hand the masks over peacefully—

Jay:
I don't even have to know the rest of the choices. I like that one.

Harumi:
Or what?

Kai:
Or we'll have to get all ninja up on ya.

Harumi:
What does that even mean?

Kai:
I don't know. I was improvising. Usually Lloyd does the talking. But he isn't here. B— WHERE'S LLOYD?!

Past Aryan:
Did anybody get some FIZZ?!

[Wu, P.I.X.A.L., and the ninja barge into the Commissioner's office]

Nya:
Commissioner!

P.I.X.A.L.:
So good to see you.

Kai:
There's no time to lose.

Cole:
Sorry to barge in, but it's really quite urgent.

Zane:
We have to vacate the city.

Jay:
We need weapons, lots and lots and lots of weapons.

Wu:
Crabby!

Commissioner:
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. One at a time. Just shoot it to me straight: what's gonna do me in?

P.I.X.A.L.:
Pardon? Do you in?

Commissioner:
Every time something bad happens to the city, first thing they do is can the police commissioner. So what is it this time? Subterranean mutant insects? Indomitable flesh-eating zombies? A pirate genie?

Cole:
Pirate genie?

Commissioner:
Yes, why not? Anything can happen in this crazy town.

[Dareth shows Misako and Wu his apartment]

Dareth:
I got this place in case the Brown Ninja ever needed a secret headquarters, heh. Truthfully, I'm a little bummed the ninja haven't needed me more.

Misako:
Well, we need you now. This is perfect, Dareth.

[They go inside, but the room is very messy, making them gasp. Dareth tries to clean it]

Dareth:
The toilet's on your right. If it's yellow, let it mellow. If it's brown, flush it down. If it's blue, uh, I don't know what to do. [laughs, but Misako glares at him] Sorry. I guess this isn't the time for jokes.

Lloyd:
Show yourself, Father!

Garmadon:
You've... you've changed.

Lloyd:
So have you. I don't wanna have to fight you. [Garmadon attacks him] Please, this isn't you.

Garmadon:
This is the new me.

Lloyd:
You have power. I didn't come to fight you. My father is somewhere in there. I've saved you once. I'll save you again.

Garmadon:
There is nothing left to save! I've played many roles. Worn many masks. Father. Husband. Brother. Teacher. But only one was summoned back: Destroyer!

Lloyd:
But listen to me. You don't have to do this. Harumi's using you as a pawn.

Garmadon:
You are the pawn, a pawn to your own foolish hopes.

Lloyd:
You wouldn't hurt me, your son.

Garmadon:
I have no son.

Past Aryan:
Everything was just a trap.

Nya:
So that means...

Present Aryan:
The Second city war... has just begun.

Kai:
Not so fast!

Jay:
"Not so fast?" That's our big entrance? You used that ages ago. After all these battles, all this time, you couldn't come up with something better?

Kai:
Look, I'm sorry if I'm distracted by that giant walking thing!

Harumi:
This. This is what I wanted. To see your father's return, and for you to lose everything. How does it feel to see the end?

Lloyd:
No, I won't let it do to me what it did to you. This isn't the end, Harumi. This is just the beginning. Without my power, without my friends, I'm gonna fight you. I'm gonna fight on, because a ninja never quits.

Harumi:
Well, then, goodbye, Lloyd.

Lloyd:
Before I go, just answer me this: you said the greatest villain was the one that got away. Then what am I?