The Munsters

Herman:
The lesson I want you to learn is; it doesn't matter what you look like. You can be tall or short or fat or thin or ugly or handsome like your father, or you can be black or yellow or white, it doesn't matter. What does matter is the size of your heart and the strength of your character.

Herman:
You'll find you'll make a lot more headway with a little bit of love and affection and understanding.

Herman:
[talking to family] We shouldn't be too hasty to retaliate when someone treats us ill. In other words, one who fights fire with fire, only gets in trouble with Smokey the Bear.

Herman:
Well it's nice to know as we go through life, we can bring a little happiness to others.

Lily:
Oh Herman, you're such a monster sometimes.

Herman:
Gee, I don't know, grandpa. I haven't been down in the sewer in a hundred years.

Grandpa:
Believe me, they haven't changed.

Herman (retelling the dynamite incident):
And then there was this terrible explosion, and the next thing I knew I was lying in the gutter three blocks away, and Spot was licking my face.

Eddie:
Then what did you do?

Herman:
We took a taxi home. Eh, of course, when we got here, I made Spot give it back to the driver.