Welcome Back, Kotter, Season 4

Kotter:
I have an announcement to make.

Epstein:
Is this announcement gonna be good news?

Kotter:
Yes and no.

Freddie:
Oh, wow, man, you better give us the bad news first. [Woodman enters the classroom] Boy, that was fast!

Horshack:
Hey, Mr. Kotter, are you glad to be back in school?

Kotter:
Arnold, this is the second most painful day in a schoolteacher's life.

Horshack:
What's the first?

Kotter:
Payday.

Freddie:
Check it out, Mr. Kotter, we decided to give you one more chance.

Vinnie:
Yeah, but this is your last chance, 'cause if we're still stupid next year, forget it.

Vinnie:
Why do you even want this job?

Freddie:
To make a lot of cash money!

Vinnie:
I make $68.50 a week and $10 of that goes to Uncle Sam.

Horshack:
Oh, sure, you get your uncle a job here, but not your friends?

Epstein:
Juan Epstein don't run from nobody. I mean, I've worked over more faces than a plastic sturgeon.

Beau:
Juan, you know I'm new here, and I wonder if I might pick your brain.

Freddie:
Well, uh, you can try, but you're picking at an empty field.

Freddie:
[after sniffing smelling salts] I see they found a way of bottling Epstein's locker.

Epstein:
I'm workin' with inferior equipment here!

Beau:
Yeah, your hands and your brain!

Epstein:
Look, Mr. Woodman, you yank me off that paper, you're gonna lose a great deal of advertising retinue!