Chlopaki nie placza

Fred:
[talking to the mirror] You made a huge mistake. You wanted to f*** Fred - now Fred will f*** you.

Fred:
[referring to Grucha] He's got cat food instead of brain!

Oskar:
[after hearing a doorbell] Can't you just get up and open the door?

Laska:
I turned down the TV the day before yesterday!

Fred:
[in the car, after hitting a TV guy dresses as a hedgehog] What was that? Did we hit a dog or something?

Grucha:
I think it was a porcupine.

Fred:
What porcupine?

Grucha:
Like a big hedgehog...

Fred:
Grucha, are you really that stupid? In this country we don't have animals like that. There's aurochs, beaver, sh*t elk, fox, wolf, pine marten, horse, otter, shrew, rabbit... those the animals that live in Poland!

Grucha:
What's the difference what was it if it's dead now?

Fred:
Ha, you're wrong here! You now what's reincarnation? Have you ever heard a word this looong? Simply, it means that after death a man is rebirth as another creature, as an animal for example. Maybe you've just killed your family, your uncle or something.

Grucha:
That's just bullshit! My uncle is alive. He works in the television.

Fred:
Reincarnation amuses you, right. I've been expecting it from you. But it's an old and a wise religion, not for morons like you. Who you're going to be in your next life depends on how did you behave so far. Some, after death, become tigers, falcons or leopards...

Grucha:
And others?

Fred:
If you mean yourself I wouldn't expect too much. *A duck* is the best you can do.

Grucha:
Why are you eating my French fries? Can't you just get your own?

Fred:
I'm not hungry.

Grucha:
If you're not hungry then stop eating my fries! And if you are, buy your own!

Fred:
Can't you see what this food is doing with your brain? Apart from the burger and French fries you can't see a thing. It's a piece of a f***ing potato and you're behaving like I was harming your mother! I'm going to take a piss, 'cause I don't want to look at this!

Laska:
I can't cheat life - I'm the son of toilet king. It' a high standard to reach.

Kuba:
F***ing high...

Laska:
Bro', if you ain't got a family, you don't suffer hunger and stuff like that, you should just ask yourself a f***ing, a really f***ing important question, "What do I like to do?" And then start doing it...

Kuba:
Did you answer the question?

Laska:
Smoke weed.

Kuba:
Is there a job that involves this?

Laska:
Ambassador.

Kuba:
[laughing] On Jamaica, I think.

Laska:
Not an ambassador like that. I meant one like Tony Halik. Imagine how much stuff did he smoke with all the tribes he visited. Someone has to continue his work. I will travel the world as an ambassador of our country. I'm Laska. From Poland.

Laska's father:
[standing in a bathroom near a toilet] Now my son, like me some years ago, look inside this well of past. What do you see?

Laska:
[as a young boy] Dung!

Laska's father:
Yes, this is dung. This is an answer. For thousands of years, all the civilisations, cultures and religions, great wars and revolutions, the best people in the world, are all accompanied by dung. Now you understand? This is life. You can cheat me, you can cheat your friend, you can cheat your mommy, but you can't cheat life! That's why I understood, I understood that I should make toilets! And we will be the kings of life, my son.

Oskar:
[to himself, before having sex with a prostitute] What would the parents say?

Lili:
Oh, don't worry. They're convinced I study geography.

Oskar:
I was talking about my parents.

Bolec:
Ain't that the truth... Nigga?