Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

Henry "Indiana" Jones, Jr.:
[first lines] Russians.

Henry "Indiana" Jones, Jr.:
[After he slams into a pursuing truck while pursuing Irina Spalko.] Damn, I thought that was closer!

Henry "Indiana" Jones, Jr.:
''[After Irina asks him if he wants to say something] I like Ike.

Henry "Indiana" Jones, Jr.:
Oh, that can't be good. That can't be good at all!

Henry "Indiana" Jones, Jr.:
[to the Russians searching for him as they leave him at a nuclear test site] Sure, great! Don't wait for me!

Henry "Indiana" Jones, Jr.:
I think you just brought a knife to a gunfight.

Henry "Indiana" Jones, Jr.:
If you want to be a good archeologist, you gotta get out of the library!

Henry "Indiana" Jones, Jr.:
Come on, genius.

Henry "Indiana" Jones, Jr.:
[to a mad Harold Oxley who is speaking apparent gibberish] We went to the University of Chicago together, and you were never this interesting. My name is Ind... My name is Henry Jones, Jr.

Henry "Indiana" Jones, Jr.:
This is intolerable. (reference from his father)

Henry "Indiana" Jones, Jr.:
I have a bad feeling about this. (reference from Star Wars)

Henry "Indiana" Jones, Jr.:
Leave it to Ox to write a riddle in a dead language.

Henry "Mutt" Williams-Jones III:
[on his motorcycle, to Indiana] Get on, gramps.

Henry "Mutt" Williams-Jones III:
[to Indiana] For an old man, you're not bad in a fight. What're you like - 80?

Henry "Mutt" Williams-Jones III:
Hold up! [combs his hair] Okay, I'm ready.

Henry "Mutt" Williams-Jones III:
[Right after what is said above] Don't give these pigs anything.

Henry "Mutt" Williams-Jones III:
Ox, It's Mutt. It's me.

Henry "Mutt" Williams-Jones III:
Don't call me son! [reference to Indy telling his own father not to call him "Junior"]

Henry "Mutt" Williams-Jones III:
What are you looking at, Daddy-o! She's getting away!

Henry "Mutt" Williams-Jones III:
[combs his hair while telling Indy and Marion] I can't concentrate with you two fighting all the time!

Irina Spalko:
And where is it you would imagine I am from, Dr. Jones?

Irina Spalko:
[To Mutt while they are dueling] You fight like a young man; eager to begin, quick to finish!

Irina Spalko:
And what I do not know, I find out.

Irina Spalko:
So we will do this- what is expression? Old-fashion way. You will tell us.

Irina Spalko:
[Right before trying to push his truck of a cliff] Dosvidanya, Dr. Jones.

Irina Spalko:
[Right before she gets consumed by the knowledge] I want to know.

Mac:
JONESY!

Mac:
[The driver of the car he is in is playing Chicken with Indy] Don't get clever, Boris. You don't know him! You don't know him! You don't know him! You don't know!

Marion Ravenwood-Williams:
Get your hands off of me, you rotten, Ruskii son of a b*tch! Indiana Jones. About time you showed up! [Then walks straight past him to hug Mutt]

Jocks:
Get that greaser!

Harold Oxley:
[Repeated Line] Henry Jones, Junior!

Harold Oxley:
How much of human life is lost in waiting.

Mac:
This ain't going to be easy.

Indy:
Not as easy as it used to be.

Mac:
Well, we've been through worse.

Indy:
Yeah, when?

Mac:
Flensburg. There was twice as many.

Indy:
We were younger.

Mac:
I still am young!

Indy:
We had guns. Put your hands down, will you; you're embarrassing us.

Colonel Dovchenko:
You recognize building, yes?

[Indy looks over to the Russians dragging away the dead American soldiers they killed]

Indy:
Drop dead. [Dovchenko punches him] I'm sorry, I meant drop dead, comrade.

Indy:
You're not from around here, are you?

Irina:
And where is it you would imagine I am from... Doctor Jones?

Indy:
Well, the way you're sinking your teeth into those W-ouble-u's, I should think maybe...Eastern Ukraine.

Irina:
[lightly slaps Indy twice] You're a hard man to read, Dr. Jones.

Indy:
Ouch.

Irina:
So, we will do this, what is expression? Old-fashion way. You will tell us.

Irina:
This warehouse, where you and your government have hidden all of your secrets. Yes?

Indy:
This is a military warehouse. I've never been here before in my life.

Indy:
Compass. I need a compass. You know, North, South, East -

Mac:
West.

Irina:
No defiant last words, Dr. Jones?

Indy:
[sarcastically] I like Ike.

Colonel Dovchenko:
Put down gun.

Indy:
You got it, pal.

[Indy drops the gun and it "accidentally" shoots a Russian soldier in the foot]

Indy:
How did Deidre take the news?

Dean Stanforth:
How does any wife take such things? The look on her face was a combination of pride and panic.

Indy:
I never should have doubted you, my friend.

Dean Stanforth:
No, you have reason to question your friends these days. You know, I barely recognize this country anymore; the government has us seeing Communists in our soup.

Indy:
Brutal couple of years, huh, Charlie? [Part of the "Henry Jones theme" from the previous film plays as Indy looks at pictures of Marcus Brody and Henry Jones Senior] First Dad, then Marcus.

Dean Stanforth:
We seem to have reached the age where life stops giving us things and starts taking them away.

Mutt:
The name's Mutt. Mutt Williams.

Indy:
Mutt? What kind of name is that?

Mutt:
It's the one I picked, you got a problem with that?

Indy:
[calmly] Take it easy.

Mutt:
What is it [the crystal skull]?

Indy:
Deity carving. Mesoamerican. There are a number of crystal skulls in the world; I saw one in the British Museum. Interesting craftsmanship, but that's about it.

Mutt:
Well, laugh if you want. Oxley said he found it this time. He said this was real and he was off to a place called Akator with it.

Indy:
Akator? He said that? You're sure?

Mutt:
That's what he said, he said Akator. What is it?

Indy:
It's a mythical lost city in the Amazon. Conquistadors called it El Dorado. Supposedly, the Ugha tribe were chosen by the gods 7000 years ago to build a giant city out of solid gold. It had aqueducts and paved roads and technology that wouldn't be seen again for 5000 years. Francisco de Orellano disappeared into the Amazon looking for it in 1546. I almost died of typhus looking for it myself. I don't think it exists.

Mutt:
Why would Ox want to take the skull there?

Indy:
The legend says that a crystal skull was stolen from Akator in the 15th or 16th century, and that whoever returns the skull to the city temple will be given control over its power.

Indy:
Who is your mother, again?

Mutt:
Mary, Mary Williams. You don't remember her?

Indy:
There've been a lot of Marys, kid.

'Mutt:
[punches the table and storms from his seat] Shut up! That's my mother you're talking about, okay?! That's my mother.

Indy:
[ordering Mutt to sit down immediately] You don't have to get all sore all the time just to prove how tough you are. Sit down. Sit down, please.

Mutt:
[When told he is going too fast while driving his motorcycle through the library] That's a matter of opinion! (screaming)

Mutt:
[finishes combing his hair] What's that?

Mutt:
[shows Indy the ladder] This way down. [falls down the ladder]

Indy:
[walks down the stairs, helps Mutt back up] This way up.

[after Indy has shot a native grave guard with his own poison dart and scared off a second]

Mutt:
[disbelievingly] You're a... teacher?

Indy:
[shrugs] Part-time.

Mutt:
Dead end.

Indy:
Maybe.

Mutt:
[combs his hair] Hm--

Indy:
What are you doing? Put that thing away! [Mutt hears him and stops combing his hair] Give me some light over here.

Indy:
Dance on your own dime, will ya?

Mutt:
Ow! A scorpion just stung me, am I gonna die?

Indy:
How big?

Mutt:
Huge!

Indy:
Good.

Mutt:
Good?!

Indy:
When it comes to scorpions, the bigger the better. A small one bites you, don't keep it to yourself.

[looking at the odd shaped human skulls]

Mutt:
Why'd they do that?

Indy:
To honor the gods.

Mutt:
No, no, God's head's not like that, man.

Indy:
Depends on who your god is.

Indy:
Crystal isn't magnetic.

Mutt:
Neither is gold.

Irina Spalko:
"Now I am become Death, the Destroyer of Worlds". You recognise those words? It was your own Dr. Oppenheimer after he created the atomic bomb.

Indy:
He was quoting the Hindu bible.

Irina Spalko:
It was nuclear intimidation. But now this next level of weapon is ours to have, yours to fear.

Indy:
Weapon? What weapon?

Irina Spalko:
A mind weapon. A new frontier of psychic warfare; that was Stalin's dream.

Indy:
[laughes] Now I know why Oxley put the skull back where he found it. He knew you were looking for it.

Irina Spalko:
That skull is no mere deity carving. Surely you knew that the moment you laid eyes on it. It was not made by human hands.

Indy:
Who made it then? [Spalko stares at him, until he realises her train of thought] Come on!

Irina Spalko:
The body we found in New Mexico was not the first; we had already dissected two others from similar crash sites in the Soviet Union.

Indy:
[skeptical] Saucer men from Mars.

Irina Spalko:
The legends of Akator are all true. Early man could not have conceived it, much less built it. It was a city of supreme beings, with technologies and paranormal abilities.

Indy:
You've got to be kidding me.

Irina Spalko:
Why do you choose not to believe your own eyes? [She reveals the body stolen from Area 51 and exposes a wound in the back of its head, baring the skull] The New Mexico specimen gave us hope; unlike the others we'd found, its skeleton was pure crystal. A distant cousin, perhaps. Maybe they too were sent to find Akator. Perhaps we're all searching for the same thing. [She covers the body] There is no other explanation.

Indy:
There's always another explanation.

Irina Spalko:
The skull was stolen from Akator in the 15th century. Whoever returns it-

Indy:
-Returns it to the city temple will gain control over its powers. I've heard that bedtime story before.

Indy:
Careful, you might get exactly what you wish for.

Irina:
I usually do.

Mac:
[Jones punches Mac in his nose after Mac unties Jones] OW! You broke my nose.

Indy:
I told you so.

Indy:
Yeah, but you're alright?

Mutt:
They left my bike.

Mutt:
[when Irina holds her sword at him] Whoa, whoa, whoa, stop, stop, stop! [holds comb out] Huh? [combs his hair, shoves comb back in the pocket] I'm ready. Don't give these pigs a thing.

Indy:
You heard him.

Indy:
[to Mutt] Marion Ravenwood is your mother?!

Marion:
Oh, for God's sake, Indy! It's not that hard.

Indy:
Well, I know. I just thought -

Marion:
That I would never have a life after you left.

Indy:
No, I didn't mean-

Marion:
A really good life

Indy:
Well that's fine.

Marion:
A damn good, really good life!

Indy:
Well so have I!

Marion:
Really? You still living in a trail of human wreckage or have you retired?

Indy:
Why, you're looking for a date?

Marion:
With anyone but you!

Irina:
So Dr. Jones, you will help us? [Dovchenko c*cks a pistol and points it at Marion's back] A simple 'Yes' will do.

Indy:
Oh Marion, you had to go and get yourself kidnapped.

Marion:
Not like you did any better.

Indy:
Same old, same old...

[Indy and Marion are trapped in drysand pit]:

Mutt:
What is it, quicksand?

Marion:
I'm calm.

Indy:
No, it's a drysand pit...

Marion:
I'm sinking, but I'm calm.

Indy:
...Quicksand is a mix of sand, mud and water and depending on the viscosity it's not as dangerous as people sometimes think.

Marion:
For Pete's sake, Jones, we're not in school!

Indy:
Don't worry. There's nothing to worry about unless there's a... [suddenly there is a void collapse] ...A void collapse.

[Indy notices the giant group of ants]

Indy:
Siafu.

Marion:
What?

Indy:
Big damn ants! Go!

'Indy:
Oxley, go get help!

Oxley:
Help?

Indy:
Help!

Oxley:
Help! [leaves]

Marion:
[to Jones] Mutt can be a little impetuous.

Indy:
Believe me, it's not the worst quality in the world. Keep your arms above your head. When the kid comes back, be ready to grab something.

Marion:
Indy, he's...

Indy:
He's a good kid, Marion. You should get off his back about school. Not everyone is cut out for it

Marion:
Mutt, I mean, his name's Henry.

Indy:
[absent-mindedly] Henry. Good name.

Marion:
He's your son.

Indy:
[shocked] My son?

Marion:
Henry Jones III.

[Pause]

Indy:
Why the hell didn't you make him finish school?!

[Mutt throws a long snake into the sand pit to save Jones]

Mutt:
Grab the snake!

Indy:
Stop calling it that! Call it something else!

Mutt:
It's a snake! What do you want me to call it?!

Indy:
[afraid to touch the snake] A rope!

Mutt:
What?

Indy:
Say "grab the rope!"

Mutt and Marion:
Grab the rope!

Indy:
[surrounded by Russian soldiers after getting pulled out of the sandpit by Mutt] Thanks Ox...

Oxley:
[points at the Russians] Help.

Marion:
I'm sure I wasn't the only one to get with my life. There must have been plenty of women for you over the years.

Indy:
There were a few, but they all had the same problem.

Marion:
Yeah? What's that?

Indy:
They weren't you, honey.

Indy:
[to Mutt and Marion as he climbs onto the roof of their newly captured truck] Keep driving.

Mutt:
Well, what's he gonna do now?

Marion:
I don't think he plans that far ahead.

Mutt:
Yeah...

Indy:
[pops out from the inside of the truck with a bazooka] Scoot over will ya, Son?

Mutt:
Don't call me 'Son'! Don't.

Indy:
I think I'd cover my ears if I were you! [hoots a rocket at a giant tree cutter but it sends the large circular blade bouncing straight for them, cutting through other trucks as it goes] Duck!

Mac:
Jonesy! [Indy knocks off two Russians] Jonesy!

Indy:
Hi, Mac! [punches him]

Indy:
Marion, take the wheel!

Mutt:
That's not fair; she drove the truck!

Indy:
Don't be a child - find something to fight with!

Mutt:
[after swinging on tree vines and landing back in the truck]: Whoa!

Indy:
Whoa. [looks ahead to see a cliff] WHOA!

Mutt:
Whatever happened to your advice of "if school isn't for you just live your life and don't let anyone tell you otherwise"?

Indy:
That was before I was your father!

Indy:
[to Mac, after it is revealed that he is actually working for the Russians] So, what are you, like a triple agent?

Mac:
No, I just lied about being a double agent.

[Spalko admires the crystal skeletons of Akator]

Irina Spalko:
Look at them! Still waiting for the return of the one who was lost. They are a hive mind; one being physically seperate but with a collective conciousness. More powerful together than they can ever be apart. Imagine what they could tell us!

Indy:
I can't imagine it. Neither could the humans who built this temple, and neither can you!

Irina Spalko:
Belief, Dr. Jones, is a gift you have yet to receive. My sympathies. [She starts to climb the dais]

Indy:
Oh, I believe, sister. That's why I'm down here.

Mutt:
What are they, like spacemen?

Oxley:
[now completely sane] Interdimensional beings, in point of fact.

Indy:
Welcome back, Ox.

Indy:
Where did they go? Into space?

Oxley:
Not into space. Into the space between spaces.

Mutt:
I don't understand. Why the legend about the city of gold?

Indy:
: Well, the Ugha word for 'gold' translates as 'treasure.' But their treasure wasn't gold, it was knowledge. Knowledge was their treasure.

Indy:
Why don't you stick around, Junior?

Mutt:
I don't know. Why didn't you, "Dad?"

Oxley:
[scoffs] Dad... [gives Indy a questioning look] Dad?

Indy:
[chuckles, wraps his arm around Marion] Somewhere, your grandpa is laughing.

Oxley:
Well done, Henry.

Indy and Mutt:
Thanks, Ox.

Irina:
This warehouse, where you and your government have hidden all of your secrets. Yes?

Indy:
This is a military warehouse. I've never been here before in my life.

Irina:
Object we seek; rectangular storage container, dimensions two meters by one half meter by sixty six centimeters. Contents of box: mummified remains. This is no doubt familiar to you.

Indy:
What makes you think I've got any idea what box you're talking about?

Irina:
Because ten years ago, you were part of the team that examined it.

Indy:
What was in the steel box they took?

FBI Agent:
You tell us. You've seen it before.

Indy:
Oh, you mean that Air Force fiasco in '47? I was tossed into a bus with blacked-out windows and twenty people I wasn't allowed to speak to. Hauled out in the middle of the night in the middle of nowhere on some urgent recovery project and shown what?! Pieces of wreckage and an intensely magnetic shroud covering mutilated remains. None of us was ever given the full picture and we were threatened with treason if we ever talked about it. So you tell me, what was in the box?!

It is not in what happened to us, but how we respond to what happened to us that we are proven mentally-legitimate.

-Ikem Bu Chukwu

Colonel Dovchenko:
[last words, spoken in Russian] HELP ME!!!

Indy:
Hello? Hello? Hello! Hey! I knocked. Wait a minute.

Indy:
Wait, wait, wait! Stop! Sure, great! Don't wait for me!

Mutt:
[driving his motorcycle through the library] Split, split, split, split, split, split!

Indy:
You're going too fast!

Mutt:
That's a matter of opinion!

Irina Spalko:
JONES!!!!