Uncle Buck1989

Buck:
Well, well, well, they certainly are scraping the bottom of the barrel for cheerleaders these days.

Tia:
What are you doing here?

Buck:
I was just driving by with Miles and Maisey going out for some ice cream. Thought you might like to join us.

Tia:
I said I would be home at 10. It's not even 9!

Buck:
Who said anything about that? I thought you might like to join us for some ice cream. Maybe your boyfriend Bug here can join us. We can talk about burying the hatchet. You know what a hatchet is Bug?

Bug:
An ax?

Buck:
Sort of, yeah. I got one in my car if you'd like to see it.

Bug:
I'll pass.

Buck:
Fair enough. I like to carry it around because you never know when your going to need it. A situation may come up say for example, someone has been drinking, and about to drive a loved one home, then I'd like to know I have it. Not to kill. Just to maim. Take a little off the shoulder. Swish! The elbow. Slash! Shave a little meat off the old kneecap. Fowap! Ooooo! You got both kneecaps? I like to keep mine razor sharp. Sharp enough you can shave with it. Why I've been known to circumcise a knat. You're not a knat are you Bug? Wait a minute, bug, knat. Is there a little similarity? Whoa, I think there is! Ha ha ha. You understand what I'm talking about? I don't think you do. I'll be right back. Heh heh heh heh.

Tia:
I'm sorry. He's very over...

Bug:
Look, I think you'd better split. I don't exactly want you uncle to sic an ax on me.

Tia:
He's all talk.

Buck:
Here it is! Come over here, Bug! Come on, I want to show it to you. Maybe later. Okay. Let go Tia!