Dr. Seuss' How the Grinch Stole Christmas2000

Santa Claus:
[heartly] Ho-ho-ho!

Grinch:
Fatboy should be finishing up anytime now. Talk about a recluse. He only comes out once a year, and he never catches any flak for it! Probably lives up there to avoid the taxes.

Santa:
[flying with his reindeer, lead by Rudolph] Merry Christmas!

Grinch:
Oopsie. Forgot about the reindeer.

Narrator:
Did that stop the old Grinch? No. The Grinch simply said...

Grinch:
If I can't find a reindeer, I'll make one instead. [reaches for Max, who whimpers and runs away] Oh, Maaaaaa-AAAAAAX!!

Narrator: So he called his dog Max. Then he took some red thread… and tied a big horn... on top of his head.

[The Grinch dresses Max with reindeer antlers and a red nose as Rudolph. He claps his hands, makes a gleeful noise and puts on a director's cap, mimicking Ron Howard, the director.]

Grinch:
[to Max as Rudolph] Alright, you're a reindeer. Here's your motivation: Your name is Rudolph, you're a freak with the red nose and nobody likes you. Then one day, Santa picks you and you save Christmas. [Max stares at him blankly] No, forget that part. We'll improvise, just keep kind of loosy-goosy. You hate Christmas, you're gonna steal it! Saving Christmas was a lousy ending. Way too commercial. [sits down on director's chair and holds up megaphone; amplified] ACTION! [Max pops off the red nose; jumps out of seat, ecstatic] BRILLIANT!! You reject your own nose because it represents the glitter of Commercialism! Why didn't I think of it?! Cut, print, check the gate, moving on.