Meet the Fockers2004

Greg Focker:
[high on Truth Serum, giving a speech] Hello everybody. I am, uh, about to set sail on my ship... on the sea of life with my first mate - the beautiful Pamela Byrnes.

Pam Byrnes:
Love you, baby! (blows kiss)

Greg Focker:
[drunkenly blows back kiss, pauses] I still masturbate to Pam. What? She's hot - check out those b*obs. I just wanna lather 'em up with soap and... [blabbers incoherently] rub my face in 'em. I could take a vacation in there. What? Gosh, sorry for you being perfect! And there's another wonderful lady in the audience, my future mother-in-law Dina Byrnes! Dina-Dina-Bo-Bina-I-love-Dina! Byrnes! You know they say you can tell from looking at the mother what your wife will look like in the future - well, I'ma looking, and I'm-a LIKIN... [sees Jorge] In my first... passionate sexual awakening, I made sweet, sweet love to my housekeeper, Isabel.

Pam Byrnes:
Come on, honey, that was in the past, so sit down.

Greg Focker:
No, no, no, baby - I gotta get this off my chest.

Pam Byrnes:
Please... sit.

Greg Focker:
We conceived a child. And his name is Jorge Villalobos. Come on up here, Jorge. This is the fruit of my loins. Come on! Search your feelings, Jorge. You know it to be true. Yo soy tu papa! Yeah, I know, a lot of information to take in. Give that boy a hand. [everyone applauds] Oh, and Jack? PAM'S PREGNANT. [Pam gasps in horror] Focker... out. [falls backward, passing out]