Shaun of the Dead2004

[Pete storms in and snatches album off of vinyl player]

Shaun:
Don't scratch it! Wha- [Pete throws album out the window] That was the second album I ever bought!

Pete:
It's four in the f***ing morning!

Shaun:
It's Saturday!

Pete:
No, it's not. It's f***ing Sunday, and I've got to go to f***ing work in four f***ing hours 'cos every other f***er in my f***ing department is f***ing ill! NOW CAN YOU SEE WHY I'M SO F***ING ANGRY?!

Ed:
F***, yeah!

Shaun:
Woah, woah, Pete, look...all right, we had a couple of drinks...we split up with Liz tonight.

Pete:
...All right, just keep it down a bit.

Shaun:
Sure. [Pete turns to leave]

Ed:
[mutters] Prick. [Pete stops]

Pete:
What was that?

Ed:
Nothing. [Pete goes to swing at Ed; Shaun attempts to stop him]

Shaun:
Whoa, we're all friends here–

Pete:
He's not my friend, he's a f***in' idiot!

Ed:
What's that supposed to mean?

Pete:
It means, why don't you F*** OFF!?! You wanna live like an animal, go live in the shed, you thick f***!

Shaun:
Oh, f*** you!

Pete:
Stop defending him, Shaun! All he ever does is hold you back! Or does it make your life easier having someone around who's more of a loser than you are?

Shaun:
[Hurt] What's that supposed to mean?

Pete:
You know what I mean. I assume it was Liz that did the dumping. [pause, pointing at Shaun with a bandaged hand] Sort your f***ing life out, mate!

Ed:
Whassup with you hand, man?

Pete:
[distracted] I got mugged on the way home from work.

Ed:
[amused] By who?

Pete:
[with growing irritation] I dunno, some crackheads or something. One of 'em bit me.

Ed:
[feigning disbelief] Why did they bite you?

Pete:
[angrily] I DON'T KNOW, I DIDN'T STOP TO ASK THEM!! [pause, clutching sinuses] Look, I've got a splitting headache, and your stupid hip-hop isn't helping. [he heads for the stairs, stopping at the front entryway] And the front door is open, AGAIN! [slams front door shut]

Ed:
[Sulkily] It's not hip-hop, it's electro. Prick. Next time I see him, he's dead.