Sixteen Candles1984

The Geek:
[about Samantha] She's cranked for you. I told her you asked about her, right? The girl freaked. She had a fit. She thinks you're the cat's meow!

Jake:
Really? She came up to me in the gym tonight. She looked at me like I was a loner.

The Geek:
Girls will do that, Jake. You know? They know that guys are like in perpetual heat, right? They know we do it, and they enjoy pumping us up. It's pure power politics, I'm telling you.

Jake:
I thought she hated my guts.

The Geek:
Games, Jake. Silly torturous games. You know how many times I've gone without lunch because some witch borrows my lunch money? Any halfway decent girl can rob me - blind! Because I'm too torqued up to say no. It's heinous, I'm telling you.

Jake:
You better not be lying to me. It'd be a major downer to try and get together with this girl and find out that she really does think I'm a slime.

The Geek:
Jake, would I lie to you? Let me put it to you this way: what happens to me if I lie to you?

Jake:
Heh, I'd kick you.

The Geek:
Right! So why would I lie? But I feel compelled to mention to you, Jake, that if all you want of the girl is a piece of her, I mean, I'll either do it myself, or get someone bigger than me to kick you. I mean, not many girls in contemporary American society today would give their underwear to help a geek like me.

Jake:
I can get a piece of her anytime I want. Shoot, I've got Caroline in the bedroom right now, passed out cold. I could violate her ten different ways if I wanted to.

The Geek:
[almost chokes on a pretzel] What are you waiting for?