Crank2006

Eve:
Jesus! F***! Are they really...

Chev Chelio:
They're dead.

Eve:
How do you... How can you do that?

Chev Chelio:
I told you, baby. I quit.

Eve:
[He parks the car] Where are you going?! [He gets out]

Chev Chelio:
Stay there, honey. [He walks into a hardware store and Eve finds him hammering nails into his leg] Jesus! F***!

Eve:
Chev!

Chev Chelio:
A**hole! I can't feel my leg. Sh*t!

...

Chev Chelio:
I've been trying to call you for a half hour. Where the f*** have you been?

Doc Miles:
In my office. Can you make it over here?

Chev Chelio:
Sure' why not?

...

Doc Miles:
Chocolate' what's this f***ing receipt from Gold Foods Market for $254?

Chocolate:
Snacks.

...

Eve:
I hate television.

...

Chev Chelio:
I owe you again, Doc.

Doc Miles:
Chevy' you're my best customer.

Chev Chelio:
What is this stuff?

Doc Miles:
Synthetic epinephrine... diluted with some saline.

Chev Chelio:
Feels sort of good.

Doc Miles:
Well, I got a little meth in there' too. You're feeling the endorphins.

Chev Chelio:
Wait a minute. I'm not better?

Doc Miles:
No' you're not better. You're in such sh*t shape' it's stunning. I can't believe your heart's beating. You should be in a f***ing medical journal.

Chev Chelio:
So, what are you going to do?

Doc Miles:
The solution acts as a competing inhibitor. It's pushing the poison out of your receptors' and replacing it with a chemical. It's just a temporary fix.

Chev Chelio:
Then what?

Doc Miles:
Then you're f***ed. I can put you on life support and string this out for a few days. But you're going to go into a comma at some point. Does she know?

Doc Miles:
Why don't I load you up with something, and you can go out in a beautiful dream.

Chev Chelio:
A dream.

Doc Miles:
Can I do that for you?

Chev Chelio:
No, no, no. That's not what I want.

Doc Miles:
What do you want?

Chev Chelio:
One hour. I want one hour.

Doc Miles:
Give me a f***in' break.

...

News reporter:
So, the wild rampage that began 9am in L.A. Continues. The suspect, still at large.

...

Associate:
We didn't give him enough Chinese sh*t.

Ricky:
You think?! [Answers phone] Dude, it's him! What's up, corpse?

Chev:
Bonjour, douche bag, Thought you might be interested in a deal.

Ricky:
Oh, you a dealer, now?

Chev:
Don't you worry about what I am. Listen, I want the antidote.

Ricky:
Oh, the antidote?!

Chev:
That's right, the antidote.

Ricky:
What you prepared to give me?

Chev:
How about that jewelry I got off that f*ggot brother of yours, you cocksucker? Don't pop a blood vessel, you little penis.

Ricky:
Okay.

Chev:
You like the deal?

Ricky:
Whatever!

Chev:
Be at the downtown Lint in 20 minutes. You know the spot?

Ricky:
Yeah.

Chev:
Don't be late, or I'll trade the thing to a whore for a hand job. Look, I said I said I'd f***in' be...

Ricky:
F***!

Chev:
See you later, sunshine. Dammit! F***!

Ricky:
Yo, it's Verona. You won't believe this call I just got.

...

Chev:
It's gonna be all right, baby.

Eve:
But you said...

Chev:
No, no. Things have changed. There's an antidote. I can make a deal for it, but I got to go alone.

Eve:
I'm scared.

Chev:
Of course. You'll be safe, now. And I'll be back.

Eve:
Promise?

Chev:
I promise.

Ricky:
What's happening, bro?!

...

[Chev steps into hotel elevator]

Asian man:
[In woman's voice] Where did I go wrong?!

Chev:
You f***in' just say something?

Asian man:
It's like talking to the wall.

Chev:
Mom?

Asian man:
I'm amazed you remember you have a mother.

Chev:
Please, I haven't got time for this.

Asian man:
You're never around. I've never seen you in the house in sixteen years.

Chev:
Yeah, yeah, yeah, right mom, with you popping valium like tic tacs. I really wouldn't wish at all someone would so this. Why would I stick around for entertainment like this?

Asian man:
[In asian language] That's hurtful.

Chev:
Please, I've no time for this.

Asian man:
[In Orlando's voice] You got no time, period. You're a persistent motherf***er, Chelios. I give you that.

Chev:
Orlando?

Chev:
This is weird.

Asian man:
Yeah, I know this is weird, but you know, this has gotta stop sometime. [In asian language] Who do you think you are? Michael Myers [In Ricky's voice] They pop you and you keep getting up?

Chev:
I'm the terminator.

Asian man:
You was, but here's a new gun in town.

Chev:
You know, I just don't get it. Why didn't you cut me up when you had the chance?

Asian man:
Too easy, motherf***er. Look at you. Bi-polar, sadomasochistic tendencies... Adrenaline junkie...

Alter Chev ego:
...addicted to violence... probably spends every day looking for the big thrill, the big rush, Carving up a guy while he screams in his own blood and excrement, would be like... like a gift. A warriors death.

Asian man:
[Chev's voice] Hell, you'd probably get off on it.

Chev:
Why do you ask this?

Alter Chev ego:
Maybe it's best for a guy like you. Going downhill. Winding down. Inevitable. Under so many circumstances.

Chev:
Who are you anyway?

Asian man:
[In asian language] Don't you know?

Chev:
I think I'm starting to figure it out.

Asian man:
[In Chev's voice] Better late than never. You know you're gonna die up there.

Chev:
Yeah, maybe. But I'm taking you with me. [Alter ego Chev becomes radiant with UV light and then disappears with the Asian man becoming default] Some pills, Doc.

Asian man:
[In asian language] Did you f***ing say something?

Henchman:
Chelios?

Chev:
Hello, girls.

Henchman:
Hold up. Give me the piece.

Chev:
Now, isn't that a f***ing picture?

Carlito:
Chelios. What a f***ing nightmare you are.

Chev:
No sh*t.

Carlito:
Sit down.

Ricky:
Whoa! Wait a minute. You pat him down, again. I know he's carrying something.

Carlito:
Let me see that.

Chev:
Motherf***er.

Carlito:
Clever. What is this, an insulin pump?

Chev:
Basically.

Ricky:
What the f*** is insulin? [Carlito holds up finger for silence]

Carlito:
Ephedrine, right?

Chev:
Yeah.

Carlito:
You're very resourceful.

Chev:
Found a new master, little b*tch?

Ricky:
I'm nobody's b*tch.

Chev:
You'll be a b*tch when Carlito hires you for half what he paid me.

Carlito:
That's enough.

Chev:
You'll throw boss a reach-around, show him you're a good b*tch.

Ricky:
I'm nobody's little b*tch! [Points gun at Chev] You f***in' hear me? He'll pay me what I tell him to pay!

Carlito:
That's enough! Sit down! It's been a long f***ing day. In the end, you have to admit, it all works out quite nicely. Don Kim gets his bullet, thanks to you, and Hong Kong gets a goat to take the fall. Please understand, it's nothing personal.

Ricky:
Speak for yourself. [Mimics a kiss]

Chev:
That what I think it is?

Carlito:
It's the Chinese sh*t. Hold him down.

Chev:
[Makes a gun gesture] Not so fast, motherf***er!

Ricky:
He's gone dipsy-do, yo! [Chev points at him] Whatever, psycho!

Carlito:
I'm afraid the Houdini act is over, my friend. [Points at a henchman who falls down from a headshot]

Ricky:
Our Father, who art in...

Carlito:
Shut up!

Don Kim:
So, this is how it is! [Camera pan-out reveals Don Kim and his hitmen team]

Ricky:
It's Don Kim! He's supposed to be dead!

Chev:
Presto. [Gun fight between henchmens of Carlito and Don Kim ensues]

News reporter:
Police have moved to surround the Hotel Lint, where the madman behind today's mayhem... is holed up and making a desperate last stand. Officials have confirmed gunfire on the sundeck. Our news chopper will bring live, uncensored coverage from above the hotel. Again, this coverage is uncensored, so any small children present should leave the room.

...

[Ricky has given chase to the helicopter with Chev in pursuit]

Ricky:
Get me out of here! I'll kill you, Chelios!

Chev:
Too late!

Carlito:
[A Don Kim thug has thrown a grenade] Look out! [Grabs a henchman to cover the grenade]

Henchman:
Thanks, boss.

Ricky:
Let's get the f*** out of here, now! Let's go!

Chev:
[Points gun] Present from Kaylo.

Ricky:
Now what?

Chev:
Now you say sh*t!

Carlito:
Where the f*** were you?!

Ricky:
[Plunges syringe into Chev's neck] Who's the b*tch, now?! [Shoots Carlito and climbs into helicopter] No, no! You fly, motherf***er! Motherfuckin' fly!

Chev:
You're dead!

Ricky:
[Chev and Ricky are fighting in the airborne helicopter and they fall out in free fall still fighting] Oh my God! You're dead! You're dead, motherf***er!

Chev:
Thought I'd told you I'd kill you, you little b*tch! [Chev then snaps Ricky's neck who drifts away lifeless and Chev then makes a phone call]

Chev:
Hey, its Eve. I'm glad you called but I'm not here. Leave a message, unless you're selling something 'cause I'm not interested. If you're not, then just... Wait, time's up. Hey, doll... Looks like I let you down, again. Seems like all my life I've just been going... going... going... I wish I'd taken more time to stop and smell the roses, so to speak. Well, I guess it's too late for that now. You're the greatest, baby. [Chev lands on a vehicle, bounces onto the road and a heartbeat is heard]