The Pacifier2005

Shane Wolfe:
Got them here. My fault.

Murney:
Yeah, I always said these kids needed a parole officer. I guess Mrs. Plummer thought so too, huh? Wow, you got a real upper torso going on, huh? You ever do any time?

Seth:
[low] Sasquatch.

Murney:
You got something to say, boy?

Seth:
No.

Murney:
No? Good. Wow, it looks like you have a pair of legs coming out of your shoulders. You hit the gym a lot, do you?

Shane Wolfe:
Eh.

Seth:
[low tone] Woolly mammoth.

Murney:
All right, you know what, Creeper? You just bought yourself an extra 15 minutes on the mats with the Murninator!

Shane Wolfe:
Excuse me, Lieutenant Shane Wolfe. I'm watching the kids for the Plummers, a few days.

Murney:
Oh, babysitter, huh? Well, good, whatever job you can get, right? I'm Murney, Dwayne Murney. My friends call me "Little Puppet". I'm the VP here. I'm in charge of discipline, conduct and truancy from top to bottom, K through 12. You're in my house now, strong man.

Shane Wolfe:
You're the vice principal.

Murney:
And the wrestling coach. See the Creeper over there? He has played hooky from every wrestling practice this month. And her, she has missed 22 Driver's Ed classes out of 23! These are the worst students in my school. I'm ashamed of...

Claire Fletcher:
Your school? Good morning, kids. [clears throat] Mr. Murney, thank you so much for watching my chair for me. I'll take it from here.

Murney:
Roger that. Absolutely. I was just informing our new friend here about some of the duties as vice principal.

Claire Fletcher:
Yes, and speaking of which, how's it going with the investigation into the baloney slices on the cafeteria ceiling?

Murney:
Oh, that's been taking some interesting turns.

Claire Fletcher:
You just keep up the good work.

Murney:
Right then. I'll be on the roof.

Claire Fletcher:
Bye, now. All right, kids, I think it's time to get back to class. I'll cut you some slack seeing as it's Lieutenant Wolfe's first day. Thank you.