Delocated2008

[Kim kisses Jon after Jon's parents were killed]

Jon:
Uh, hey, man, get your hands off my girl. [laughing]

[Kim realizes the Jon she was kissing is another Fake Jon]

Kim:
What the f*** is going on?!

Jon:
I got a perm! [laughs]

Mike:
It's obvious The Mirminskys have stepped things up. The government's launched a program called "Operation Many Jons". We've dispatched a group of decoys. Send them in.

Jon:
DECOYS! How awesome is that? Check it out. Look at this.

Mike:
Now, the decoys will be in holding right down the hall. If Jon needs to go downstairs to buy toilet paper, a decoy goes down. If Jon needs to go for a jog, a decoy goes down and Jon goes to the fitness center.

Kim:
Jon, are your parents dead?

Jon:
Nope.

Kim:
[attacks Jon] HOW DARE YOU DO THAT TO ME?!

Jon:
STOP IT! RELAX! We got to make sure this decoy thing works, okay? That's why I did it. What, do you want me to die?

Kim:
What?

Jon:
Do you want me to die? Yes or no?

Kim:
No. Of course not.

Jon:
Alright, then take it easy about me pretending my parents were killed. It's no big deal.

Mike:
If we can't fool you, we're not gonna fool anybody.

Jon:
Exactly.

Mike:
Alright, guys, you can go back to holding.

Jon:
Wait. Hold on, guys. I want to do that thing. Ready? [singing] Ba da ba-ba-da-ba --

All Decoy Jons:
FFRT!

Jon:
[laughs] Thank you. Thank you. That was great.

Mike:
Hey, no one's bought any candy yet.