Stroker and Hoop2004

[Stroker caught the eskimo]

Stroker:
Alright, this band-camp crap ends now, you little punk.

Hoop:
Huh. What kind of an eskimo head is that?

High School Boy:
I'm a Wolverine.

Stroker:
No, you're an eskimo. The Dwight D. Eisenhower Eskimo. And you've been robbing the Truman High School Band Car Wash.

Hoop:
What would the Inuit Council of Elders think?

High School Boy:
What are you talking about? We switched to the Wolverines, like, 15 years ago. Didn't you notice the signs?

[Stroker looks at the sign that said "Go Wolverines"!]

Stroker:
Wolverines? What kind of generic crap is that?

High School Boy:
Eskimos weren't politically correct. Everybody in town dropped it-- Except for the guys over at the North Pole Wash.

Hoop:
Stroker, isn't that where C.A.R.R. was calling from?

Stroker:
One second, Hoop.

Hoop:
I think he's in trouble.

Stroker:
[to the High School Boy] Anyone can be a Wolverine or a Wildcat. But we were the Eskimos, man. The Eskimos! Doesn't that mean anything to you? Don't you get it?

Stroker:
[singing] We drag our enemies back to camp, use their blubber to fuel our lamps, uh, something, something, whale bone, walrus...uh, something, something, uh, rhymes with walrus. When we kiss it's with our nose, we're the Eisenhower Eskimos! [accidentally hits the high school boy when he finished singing]

Stroker:
Oh, god, I hated high school.