Mary Shelley's Frankenhole2010

[Joe came back with the signature on his flag that John Hancock signed]

Joe Yunger:
Looky that, man. It's lucky I had an old glory on me.

Victor Frankenstein:
Oh, well, yeah. Anyway, Joe, the answer to this whole P.E.T.U. dilemma is to get the vampire to inflict P.E.T.U, with vampirism. Then you'll kill P.E.T.U. so they can't douse you with menstrual blood anymore. Then you can finally kill the regular vampires so I can watch movies in peace!

Joe Yunger:
Are you nuts? Vampires ain't never gonna disable their own protectors!

[switches to the next scene in a movie theater where the vampires will actually disable their own protectors]

Joe Yunger:
You will?

Vampires:
We will?

Count African Americula:
Yes. We'll meet you outside the torch & pitchfork after the movie's over. Then, you pretend to try to kill us. When P.E.T.U. jumps out, we'll make sure they're fanged before you get doused with the blood.

Victor Frankenstein:
Great!

[Victor and Joe leaves]

Count Chocolatey:
[to African Americula] Are you nuts?! Why we would we disable our onw protectors? Blaah!

Count African Americula:
Because we're vampires. We love biting humans, remember?

Count Chocolatey:
Oh, yeah. He's right about that.

Count Von Count:
Oh, yeah. We love them.