Mary Shelley's Frankenhole2010

Jesus Christ:
Elvis! Come on. Other people have to go to the bathroom, you know. COME ON!

Elvis Presley:
Jesus, I have 80 bathrooms in this place. Use another one.

Jesus Christ:
No! I like this one!

Elvis Presley:
Okay, alright. It'll be a second. I'm catching a brown train.

Jesus Christ:
Oh, no. Don't stink it up in there, Elvis. Would you open a window, at least, please?

Elvis Presley:
Alright, alright. Oh, hold on. Hell, golly. [grunts] Ah, the window's, uh, painted shut, Jesus. Who paints the part that opens?

Jesus Christ:
No, it's not painted shut! Come on, Elvis. Try harder.

Elvis Presley:
Okay, hold on. [grunting intensifies]

Jesus Christ:
Harder! Strain harder!

Elvis Presley:
Oh, Jesus, my heart!

Jesus Christ:
STRAIN! STRAAAIN!

Elvis Presley:
[moans] Oh, golly! I see the tupelo sunshine. [weakly] My bare feet...I got a polliwog in a bucket. [grunts] [thud]

Jesus Christ:
Elvis? [knocks] You open that window? Please say you did.

[toilet flushes]

Jesus Christ:
Finally!

[as Jesus was about to head in, Death comes out of the bathroom]

Death:
Phew! I'd give it a few minutes in there.

[then Jesus start to piss on the floor]

Jesus Christ:
Ohhhhhhh. So good.

Death:
Ugh.