Eagleheart2011

[after Chris fake his death when someone brings him in]

Brett Mobley:
Hey, Chris, how's it going?

Chris Monsanto:
Brett, what happened...to you?

[Chris sees Brett's legs cut off]

Chris Monsanto:
Uh, where are your legs?

Brett Mobley:
Oh, right. Uh, well, it turns out Lulu need them to make more chili.

Chris Monsanto:
Lulu?

Lulu:
That's right, baby. [laughs] Now you know my secret ingredient.

Chris Monsanto:
Oh, my god. It can't be true.

Lulu:
Remember that night you saved my life? Yeah, that's when I got my first taste. Ooh, I'd been looking a long time for the main ingredient, and I finally found it...courage. You see, courage in the bloodstream -- Ooh, it makes the muscles relax, and that keeps the meat nice and tender. Ooh, yeah.

Chris Monsanto:
Ah. Wow. So you found the secret to tender meat, and now you use beef from courageous cows to make your chili.

Lulu:
No, no, no, no. Not from beef. My chili is made... [laughs] from Marshals.

Chris Monsanto:
Ah! Okay. Gotcha. Uh, well, that's fine, Lulu, but there's only one problem with that. This kitchen here -- It's closed...forever.

Lulu:
[pulls up a cleaver knife] Well, I'm so glad I saved the best for last. Ha ha! AH, BAFOONA!

Chris Monsanto:
Alright, now, Lulu, you can come at me if you want to, but just remember I'm Chris Monsanto, okay. I've killed over 100 bad guys. So what?

Lulu:
I ain't scared of you. Mnh-mnh. I'm gonna chop you up and taste that courage. Ha ha.

Chris Monsanto:
Alright, now, will you listen to yourself? DO you know what you're saying? If you're brave enough to waltz with a guy like me, well, then you're the one who has the courage, Lulu.

[Lulu smells herself]

Chris Monsanto:
Yeah, in fact -- Mmm -- I bet you would taste mighty fine.

Lulu:
Shut up. Ooh.

Chris Monsanto:
Oh, yeah. You would make some really good chili. Smell that brave arm. Ooh, that's good.

Lulu:
Ooh, shut your mouth!

Chris Monsanto:
Yeah, wouldn't that be a good chili with some cayenne peppers. We gonna put in some onions.

Lulu:
Ooh, yes, lots of onions. OH, COOK ME, HONEY! COOK ME!

[Lulu then puts her arm into the meat grinding machine]