Becker1998

[Becker's patient is Richard Hatch, winner of Survivor:
Borneo]

Dr. John Becker:
[checking his clipboard] Okay, uh, Mr. Hatch. I'm Dr. Becker. [he and Richard shake hands]

Richard Hatch:
Hey, Doc. Want me to take my clothes off? 'Cause that's no problem.

Dr. John Becker:
Uh, why don't we just talk first.

Richard Hatch:
Okay.

Dr. John Becker:
[checking his clipboard] All right. It says you're here for... stomach distress. Any, uh, recent changes in your diet?

Richard Hatch:
No, but, uh, several months ago, I was out of the country.

Dr. John Becker:
Oh, yeah, I've seen that before. Mexico?

Richard Hatch:
No, I was on this island. My diet was very exotic. I pretty much existed on stingray, dog food, beetle larvae...

Dr. John Becker:
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Stop. What the hell's wrong with you?

Richard Hatch:
Hey, some of the *other* people there ate rats.

Dr. John Becker:
Rats? Well, why in the world would anyone do that?

Richard Hatch:
It was for "Survivor."

Dr. John Becker:
"Survivor?"

Richard Hatch:
You know, the contest? The show? It was on television.

Dr. John Becker:
Television? Oh, my God! You know, what is this world coming to? People are eating bugs and rats on a stupid television show? I swear to God! You know, TV has become nothing more than the... the Petri dish where this country grows its idiots! Don't they have better things to do than to debase themselves coast to coast?

Richard Hatch:
Well, I won.

Dr. John Becker:
Oh, yeah, won. Yeah, please. I mean, what could you possibly have won that would make up for your loss of self-respect?

Richard Hatch:
A million dollars?

Dr. John Becker:
Now, h-h-how could I get involved with something like that? Is that something that any... just anybody...

[the scene fades out]