The Inbetweeners2008

Tara:
[Simon is trying to have sex with Tara but failing] Simon, Simon... Nothing's Happening.

Simon Cooper:
I know, I know... You think I don't f***ing know that? I know that better than anyone! I know it's floppy!

Tara:
So don't worry, I was just saying...

Simon Cooper:
Don't say, okay? I know better than anyone that my Penis isn't f***ing working!

Tara:
It's okay...

Simon Cooper:
It's not f***ing okay! It's not okay!

[looks at penis]

Simon Cooper:
Why won't you start? Every time I don't want one it's there and the one time I need it... Nothing!

Tara:
Okay, You're scaring me now...

Simon Cooper:
[shouting at penis] Work you stupid, f***ing thing! Get Big! Get Big!

Tara:
Simon!

Simon Cooper:
Why aren't you doing it? Do it! Get Big! Oh, please just work you ugly c*nt!

[hits it]