The Royle Family1998

Barbara Royle:
[about Norma] To be honest, I think she might have to stay another week.

Jim Royle:
Another bloody week? Over my dead body!

Barbara Royle:
Jim, she thinks the world of you.

Jim Royle:
Thinks the bloody world of me? You'd think when she had a family sized bag of bloody Revels, did she offer me one? Did she shite! She sat on her big fat arse and commented on every single one that she put into her big fat gob!

Jim Royle:
[imitating Norma eating the Revels] Oo, coconut. OH oo orange! Oh Malt bloody Teasers!

Barbara Royle:
Oh? Is that it, then? We can't look after my own mother because she wouldn't share a bag of Revels? Grow up Jim!

Jim Royle:
Me grow up! She makes me un bloody plug everything before we go to bed! And she's got the blanket on all night!

Barbara Royle:
If it had been your mum and dad, God rest their souls, I'd have done anything for them!

Jim Royle:
She should be in her bloody home!

Barbara Royle:
Well she is in a home! She's in our home and that's where she's staying, with her family that loves her!

Jim Royle:
[imitates Norma again] Oo caramel, I think. Oh no, it's not caramel, I think it's er - oh it's coffee I think it's coffee! Greedy old cow!