Young Person's Guide to History

     

Young Person's Guide to History2008

Director: Craig Lewis, Peter Girardi, and Hugh Davidson
Genre: Comedy
A warped and absurd retelling of historical events that led to the creation of America using fantastical and anachronistic modern elements. more »


Monsieur Bouffant:
So may I ask Mr. Jefferson. What animal represents America?

Thomas Jefferson:
[Jefferson trills to buy time] The bear!

Monsieur Bouffant:
Russia.

Thomas Jefferson:
They already got the bear?

Monsieur Bouffant:
Yes. Yes.

Benjamin Franklin:
[whispers to help Jefferson] Turkey.

Thomas Jefferson:
I'm not saying turkey you stupid...

Benjamin Franklin:
Say lion.

Thomas Jefferson:
All right shut up. The...tiger the most powerful...

Monsieur Bouffant:
India.

Thomas Jefferson:
Huh... What?

Monsieur Bouffant:
India. [laughs at Jefferson]

Thomas Jefferson:
THE GARLON! [southern voice] He's like a big 'ol building with fur and anger and he flies tall and he got a big mouft and he's got a face full of buildings which he will beat you up with cause he's got a building in his pocket.

Monsieur Bouffant:
I would love to see this garlon.

Thomas Jefferson:
And you will cause I'm gonna bring a garlon back here and he's gonna swallow your wife's cock.

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Modified by timothyj.29104 on July 10, 2024


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