Animaniacs, Season 1

[The Warners ride on a city bus, in Roman outfits. Yakko is whipping the bus. The green light turns red. The bus stops at the red light, neighing like a horse]

Yakko:
How's that for an entrance?

Wakko:
[sniffs]

Dot:
[pointing to Flaxseed's Totallity of Candy] Look!

Singers:
[offscreen, as light shines on Flaxseed's Totallity of Candy] Ahhhhhhhhhhhh!

Yakko:
One of these days, I'm gonna find those singers!

[The Warners jump off the bus and go to Flaxseed's Totallity of Candy. Ferman Flaxseed is sucking on the green sucker, looking at himself in the mirror. Close-up of Ferman Flaxseed's reflection. He sees The Warner Siblings reflection in it. The Warner Siblings look in the window, pressed against the glass]

Ferman Flaxseed:
Hmm? [turns to see the Warners outside the window] Oh! What horrifying little children! I shall be frightened for hours! [waving to the Warners to go away] Go away! Go away! Shoo, shoo! You frighten me!

Dot:
Look! He's waving at us! What a nice man! He wants us to come in!

Yakko, Wakko and Dot:
[enters the candy store; singing] The candyman's swell, one look and you can tell that this nice man wears a toupee

Wakko:
Please don't mind what I will now say, I think that you should wear a beret.

Yakko, Wakko and Dot:
Hey!

Yakko and Wakko:
[spoken] We're the Warner Brothers!

Dot:
And the Warner sister!

Ferman Flaxseed:
Buy something or leave!

Yakko:
[to the viewer] I like him! Don't you?

Wakko:
This is a great store, Mr. Candyman!

Ferman Flaxseed:
I'm not the Candyman!

Dot:
Well, you sell candy, don't cha, kid?

Ferman Flaxseed:
I'm not a kid!

Yakko:
Relax, my good man!

Ferman Flaxseed:
I am not your good man!

Yakko:
[sitting on the counter] Hmm...we're running out of options here.

Ferman Flaxseed:
What...do you want?!

Yakko:
[grabbing a jar of red jelly beans] Well, world peace would be nice...and a Chevrolet in every driveway...an end to pestilence and famine...and pestilence... [Ferman Flaxseed takes the jar of red jelly beans] Until then; we're just browsing!

[The Warner=s start touching and eating the candy. Dot licks the lollipops, Yakko drinks out of the melted milk chocolate barrel, and Wakko licks a candy cane]

Ferman Flaxseed:
Stop! Stop! Stop touching everything! If you want to see something, ask!

Dot:
All right! We'd like to see the jellybeans!

[Ferman Flaxseed shows them a jar of jelly beans]

Wakko:
Not those! Those! [points upwards]

[Ferman Flaxseed looks up to see a giant jar of jelly beans on top of the giant shelf. The camera turns to truck-out fast to a high-angle shot of the really tall ladder. He turns to the Warners, nervous. The Warners smile. He climbs a very tall ladder, passing a goat on two giant candy canes]

Goat:
Baa!

[Ferman Flaxseed continues climbing, passing an astronaut]

Astronaut:
Come in, Houston!

[Ferman Flaxseed is near the top, where the giant jar of jelly beans is. His right eye gets big. He looks down, nervously. Close-up on Ferman Flaxseed's nervous face, shaking nervously, sweating]

Dot:
Don't look down! You might fall and hit your head and die and your brains would leak out all over!

[Ferman Flaxseed gulps. He grabs the giant jar of jelly beans]

Ferman Flaxseed:
[as the ladder trembles, rocking back and forth] Goh! Uuh - ooh!

Yakko:
Whoa! Dumber than advertised!

[Ferman Flaxseed climbs down the really tall ladder]

Ferman Flaxseed:
[panting] There! Now...how many do you want?

Yakko:
Oh, we don't want any! We just wanted to SEE 'em!

Warners:
[look at the giant jar of jellybeans] Thank you!

Ferman Flaxseed:
[leaping over the counter] Right! So you're making fun of me!

Yakko:
We aren't making fun of ya! THIS is making fun of ya.

Warners:
[in stupid voices] We sell candy! We sell candy!

Dot:
See the difference?

[Ferman Flaxseed snaps and jumps at them, but The Warner Siblings dodge him and run between the other aisles]

Wakko:
[grabbing taffy from The Mr. Taffy Machine] I love a taffy pull! [pulls the taffy from The Mr. Taffy Machine through three aisles and a stack of cans in a zigzag path, only to run into Ferman Flaxseed]

Ferman Flaxseed:
Give that to me! [Wakko gives him the taffy] Eaowgh! [the taffy pulls him through the stack of cans and the three aisles in the zigzag path. He smashes into The Mr. Taffy Machine. He gets up, covered in taffy]

Warners:
[chugging past him as a train, puffing out smoke] Choo-choo-choo-choo-choo-choo-choo-choo- [offscreen] Whoooo-whoooo! [they make a hissing noise as they shuffle to him]

Dot:
[handing him the toupee] You dropped your hair!

Ferman Flaxseed:
[angrily getting out of the taffy machine] Blblblbl! [putting on toupee] Bleugh! Now, this really takes the cake!

[Each Warner Sibling has a cake]

Wakko:
Where do you want us to take 'em?

Ferman Flaxseed:
[pushing the cakes] Ough! Either you BUY something right now, or I shall delight in throwing you out of here!

Yakko:
That's going to be a problem. See, we don't have any money.

Dot:
Can we have something for free?

Ferman Flaxseed:
For FREE!?! [kicks the Warner Siblings out]

Yakko:
Hey! He can't do that to us! [they go back in and get kicked out again] On second thought, uhhhhh... maybe he can!