Auf Wiedersehen, Pet, Series 1

Oz:
Er, listen, lads, if youse lot wanna make a few bob on the side, er, maybes you should come in wi' me.

Dennis:
How'd you mean, like?

Wayne:
Doin' a bit of moonlighting, are ya, Oz?

Oz:
Well, I might have this business proposition, right? See, I've met this Eric. Canny lad... for an Eric. Anyway, nothing's finalised yet, so I can't say so much, but if you want in, now's the time to speak up.

Wayne:
Hold on... d'you mean speak up to divvy up, son?

Oz:
Both, both.

Dennis:
Well, tell us what it is, then.

Oz:
Nah, I can't yet.

Neville:
Well, how will we be expected to chip in if you won't explain?

Oz:
Well, that's the whole point, man, Neville.

Neville:
Well, it escapes me, Oz!

Oz:
Look, the more yer speculate, the more coin yer get back in the back end.

Dennis:
But Oz, we're entitled to know what we're speculatin' in!

Oz:
Aye, in due course, Dennis. When I get everythin' finalised. [Checks himself in the mirror.] But, er, for the moment, all I need is yer readies and yer trust. [Turns round to see blank faces.] Was that askin' too much, like?

Dennis:
Bollocks!

Neville:
Ah, howay!

Wayne:
Nah, you're askin' too much, son.

Oz:
Well, suit yerselves, I'll seek investment elsewhere, stuff you lot!

Dennis:
Oz! How, at least give us a clue!

Oz:
[Leaves the hut... then pokes his head in a few seconds later] Well, it's adult, and it's liable to cause offence. [Leaves the hut again.]

Dennis [Thinking aloud] "It's adult, and liable to cause offence"?

Wayne:
Sounds like Oz.