Auf Wiedersehen, Pet, Series 1

Oz:
[To the crane operator, motioning] In a bit... Whoa, whoa... Right, down at that. [The crane starts lowering the bricks. To Bomber] Look, all I need is cash upfront, and then we'll be quids in.

Bomber:
What kind of business?

Oz:
Big business. Expanding markets, guaranteed demand. See, all we've got to do is buy the gear here, ship it home and then we're quids in.

Bomber:
What is it?

Oz:
Well... I don't want you goin' tellin' the rest, 'cos they never take us seriously, that lot.

Bomber:
[Motions] Cross me 'eart. Now, what are you on about?

Oz:
[Whispering] Porn.

Bomber:
[Mishearing] What? Corn?

Oz:
[Whispering] No, man. Porn, man. Porn, yer kna?

Bomber:
What are you on about? Are you opening Gateshead's first massage parlour?

Oz:
Nah, man. Videos, man. Importing videos. [The operator stops lowering the bricks.]

Bomber:
You're askin' me to handle pornographic videos? Me? The father of five children?

Oz:
Well, they don't have to watch 'em.

Bomber:
Are you off your rocker, lad?

Oz:
Ah, well, forget it. [Waves his hands, the crane operator mistakes this as a signal to lower the bricks onto the scaffold.] I just thought with five bairns, you might've needed the extra coin.

Bomber:
You're off your bloody rocker, boyo! [The pallet lands on the scaffold... and on Bomber's foot!]