Bottom, Series 3

[Eddie with his revolver walks up to the parrot in its cage]

Eddie:
I know what you're thinking, Parrot. You're thinking "How many shots did I fire, back there in Act 2 Scene 1?" Well, to tell you the truth, in all the excitement of of Richie forgetting most of his fucking lines, I've kind of forgotten myself. So, Parrot, do you feel lucky? Come on, make my day!

Parrot:
You fired six you big fat bastard!

Eddie:
That's right!

[Eddie fires six rounds, shooting the parrot to pieces]

Eddie:
But I fucking RELOADED!

[Richie brings in a wheelbarrow containing spare Semtex]

Richie:
(calling) Semtex! Ah...it's a heck of a smidgen, Eddie. Almost dislocated me shoulder twice wheeling it down the corrid-- [Richie unwinds the electric cable and quickly realizes that it was horribly tangled] Who fucked up with this bloody thing!? BASTARDS!!! I'm on the fucking television as well!

Eddie:
Right, that's it. I'm getting me beret and dark glasses on and getting on a ferry to Belgium.

[Eddie mockingly turns away from the audience]

Richie:
No, no, no!! It's alright, it's alright. The cunts didn't notice!