Dan Vs., Season 1

Dan:
Are you trying to kill me?

Elise:
Don't tempt me.

Don What are you doing here?

Dan:
Obviously, I'm sneaking up on you. Just give me what is rightfully mine, and I'll go.

Elise Sr.:
What do you want exactly?

Dan:
Chris.

Don:
I don't know. Sounds reasonable.

Elise Sr.:
Don, stop it. We are not giving him Chris, even if we'd like to.

Chris:
Dan, this is really unacceptable.

Dan:
It's all your fault.

Chris:
This is not my fault.

Elise Sr.:
It's kind of your fault. He's your friend.

Dan:
If you'd just come with me to Dismemberfest.

Elise:
Okay, let's go. Dan, you are not invited on this camping trip, don't follow.

Dan:
Your not the boss of me, lady. I go where I plea- Hey! Is that my car battery? I'LL PUT YOU ON THE LIST! I'LL PUT ALL OF YOU ON THE LIST!