Family Guy, Season 13

Stewie:
Lois! Lois! Mommy!

Brian:
Stewie, what's going on? You should be asleep by now.

Stewie:
I can't sleep, Brian. Where's the woman? I need her to read me a bedtime story.

Brian:
Oh, she's busy with the blood drive. Maybe I can help. [grabs a book] How about I read you this one? It's called "Apathetic George". [reads the book] "George used to be a curious monkey, but after a month in captivity, all he did was wait for food. The zoo people wanted him to mate, but he lost interest in that, too. Twenty years and millions of dollars in zoo revenue later, he died."

Stewie:
Okay, I've had enough.

Brian:
All right, you know what? I know something that will help you sleep. Wait here.

Stewie:
Well, I hope so, because I've tried everything. Counting sheep and thinking sleepy thoughts. I even hired the Sandman.

[Cutaway to the said guy throwing sand all over Stewie]

Peter:
Sand and sand and sand and sand and sand and sand and good night!