Gravity Falls, Season 1

[Grunkle Stan is wearing the Truth Telling Teeth, a set of golden dentures that force the wearer to tell the truth]

Mystery Shack Customer:
Excuse me, do you think this T-shirt is my size?

Stan:
Never mind the T-shirt! Hey everybody! Look at this guy's abnormal and unattractive face! [stands on the counter, grinning]

Mabel:
[leading the customer away] I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry.

[Cut to Stan writing in his office]

Stan:
D-doing my taxes!

Dipper:
[reads a tax form with "I HAVE COMMITTED TAX FRAUD" written across in bold red ink] Uh, Grunkle Stan, why did you write this?

Stan:
Because I regularly commit massive tax fraud!

Dipper:
...Might wanna tuck that one away, there. [drops the form into a shredder]

[Cut to Stan, Mabel, and Dipper watching TV]

Circus Performer on TV:
[juggling while riding a unicycle surrounded by three crocodiles] Do-do-doooo! Oh no! [Dipper and Mabel laugh]

Stan:
Sometimes I think: is this all there is? Is life just some kind of horrific joke without a punchline? That we're all just biding our time until the sweet, sweet release of death?

[Dipper and Mabel are visibly disturbed.]