Parks and Recreation, Season 7

Leslie:
So this is where you want to eat lunch? In a steakhouse? Don't you have irritable bowel syndrome? God I hate that I know that.

Jamm:
Yeah it's murder on the old plumbing but Tammy only wants me to eat steak and whiskey. She has my stool analyzed just to keep me honest.

Leslie:
I don't think this relationship is that healthy...I mean, it seems like Tammy is trying to turn you into Ron, and you're Jeremy Jamm! Come on! You love Porsches and spiked iced tea and you have a Hooters platinum card.

Jamm:
Yeah Tammy doesn't really let me do that stuff anymore but you know it's good you know!? I'm better now. I mean sure I'm depressed...and constantly sick...and nothing really brings me joy but it just feels right!

[Jamm breaks down crying]

Jamm:
Oh God!

Leslie:
Oh boy...

Jamm:
Oh help me Knope! I used to be so great! Remember everybody thought so!

Leslie:
Well...

Jamm:
[Crying] Oh God! Oh God!

Leslie:
Wow! This is worse than I thought! You're broken! She has broken you! You need to get away from her!

[Jamm pulls some of his hair out]

Jamm:
Oh God whoa hey! Look at that more hair came out!

[Jamm starts laughing and crying hysterically]