Sam & Cat

[last lines of the series'YOU'RE THE BEST ROOMMATE EVER DON'T LEAVE PLZ]

[in Nona's apartment]

Sam:
Hey, Nona. What goes…? Hey, what are you doing?

Nona:
Well, I'm getting ready to go back to Elderly Acres.

Sam:
What? No! What? No. You can't leave! Well, come on! What's for dinner? I mean, let's go, right? Mac and cheese and cheese and cheese and cheese, huh?

Nona:
I got a phone call. I can go back now. The funk mites are gone.

Sam:
Well, that's great, but—

Nona:
And Cat's coming home tonight, and she's going to need her bed back.

Sam:
But… but I don't want you to leave!

Nona:
Oh, honey. You'll be all right.

Sam:
[sobs] No, I won't!

Nona:
Sam. [Pearphone rings] I think that's your phone ringing.

Sam:
[answers Pearphone] Who is it?

Dice:
Sam?

Sam:
What do you want?

Dice:
I got good news and bad news.

Sam:
What?

Dice:
Well, the good news is I got the cover of the magazine.

Sam:
Wow. Yeah, great. What's the bad news?

Dice:
One of the other boys is being taken to a scalp hospital.

Sam:
That's it?

Dice:
No, Cat's being arrested.

[The police puts handcuffs on Cat]

Cat:
I mean, it really looks like a wig.

Sam:
Wait, Cat was really arrested?

Dice:
Yes. You got to get Nona to come to Arizona and bail her out, or else Cat's going to be in jail for 2 weeks.

Sam:
Really? Okay, I'll try to tell Nona if I can. Bye.

Dice:
Bye.

Nona:
Who was that?

Sam:
Oh, that was Dice and Cat.

Nona:
Oh, are they coming back here?

Sam:
Um, no.

Nona:
What's going on?

Sam:
[lying] They decide to stay in Phoenix for 2 more weeks, so Cat says you should stay here and take care of me until she gets back.

Nona:
Really?

Sam:
I promise.

Nona:
Well, I guess I better start dinner then. [laughs]

Sam:
Yep. Yes, you should. [starts lying on the couch]