South Park, Season 23

Dr. Gauche:
We have a major epidemic here, Detective. C. diff. has spread to half the town. We don't have enough staff or enough to supplies to keep up with it.

Sgt. Yates:
How does this happen?

Dr. Gauche:
Apparently, the outbreak started at a restaurant when some women got sick on everybody. The women contracted C. diff. by giving themselves DIY fecal transplants.

Sgt. Yates:
So they got sick from another women's feces?

Dr. Gauche:
No, they got sick from using this, [holds up a turkey baster] a common household turkey baster. It's a thing most people use just once a year, around Thanksgiving. The rest of the year it just sits in a drawer collecting bacteria, and then the ladies went and stuck it up their asses.

Sgt. Yates:
OH, those ladies!

Dr. Gauche:
It gets worse. We're completely out of healthy donor feces. Even if we found a donor at this point, it wouldn't be enough to give everyone transplants.

Sgt. Yates:
So what happens next?

Dr. Gauche:
With how contagious C. diff. is and how deadly, half of South Park is going to die.

Sgt. Yates:
Jesus... what have those rascally ladies done? [walks off]