South Park, Season 8

South Park (1997–present) is an adult animated television series created by Trey Parker and Matt Stone. Distributed by and airing on Comedy Central, it follows the surreal adventures of four young boys who live in the small town of South Park, Color… more »

[As Stan, Kyle, and Kenny prepare to infiltrate and destroy Wall-Mart, they are confronted by Cartman wielding a dagger:
]

Cartman:
Wall-Mart's a great store! I cannot let you fools ruin its terrific bargains. You see, I was working for Wall-Mart all along!

Kyle:
I knew you were.

Cartman:
No, you didn't.

Kyle:
(frustrated) Yes, I did. I said from the beginning that you would do this!

Cartman:
No, you didn't.

Kyle:
Yes, I did!

Cartman:
No, you didn't!

Kyle:
Yes, I did!

Cartman:
No, you didn't!

[Kyle and Cartman argue back and forth like this until they're shouting at the same time.]

Cartman:
(after a brief silence) You see, Kyle, it was me who slashed the bus tires-

Kyle:
(speaking over him) -slashed the bus tires in Arkansas. I said so! I told you the minute-

Cartman:
(places hands over ears) LALALALALA! I CAN'T HEAR YOU!

Kyle:
Hey, I told you-

Cartman:
I CAN'T HEAR YOU! LALALALALA!

[They both go silent]

Cartman:
(brandishes dagger again) I'm sorry, boys, but if you want to hurt the Wall-Mart, you'll have to go through me.

Kyle:
We don't have time for this! Kenny, keep him away from us.

[Stan and Kyle go around Cartman, while Kenny steps up and faces him.]

Cartman:
Very well, Kenny. Let us battle!

[Kenny starts hitting Cartman]

Cartman:
Ow! Kenny! Kenny, knock it off!

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Submitted by wikidude on June 03, 2024

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