Trailer Park Boys, Season 3 (2003)

[Ricky pulls up next to Randy and Jim]

Ricky:
Hey, guys. Don't want any trouble. Just got out of jail, I'm a new man. I got lots of money, all right? So I don't want to start any bullshit. What I do want is a brand-new double-wide trailer. The nicest one you got.

Jim:
That'll cost you, Ricky.

Ricky:
Yeah? Well, here's a thousand dollars down, for hook-up fees and six month's lease up front.

Jim:
Where the hell'd you get that kind of money?

Ricky:
I got lots of money, Lahey.

[Julian rolls past in a new Ford Mustang convertible, stereo thumping]

Jim:
Oh, I get it. Never mind.

Ricky:
Lahey, I've got my own money, all right? I got lots of it in an endless supply. I want a double-wide trailer by 5:00 tomorrow or I'm calling Barbara. Simple as that.

Jim:
Ricky, I'm not hauling anything in this park unless I get $5000 down.

Ricky:
Believe me, I'd give you the money right now, but I don't trust either one of you fuck row knots.

Jim:
Yeah? And I don't trust you, shit bat. Collateral, Rick, or no trailer.

Ricky:
Fine. I'll give you some collateral. Why don't you go around and tell everybody in this park that I'll kiss your bare ass if I don't have the money by five o'clock tomorrow. That's some fucking collateral, isn't it?

Randy:
You'll kiss his bare ass?

Ricky:
That's what I said, dumbass.

Jim:
Ricky, that would mean that you'd agree to play by Sunnyvale Trailer Park rules. You willing to put that in writing?

Ricky:
Gimme a fucking pen!

Jim:
Get a lease agreement, Randy. Special clauses. Rick?

[Jim hands Ricky a pen, Ricky gives Lahey a twenty dollar bill]

Ricky:
That's for the pen. And you know what? I get out of jail, I try to start things off on the right foot. And you wouldn't do that, would you? So I'm gonna pay you one-hundred dollars to fuck off. Leave me alone. Just give me my trailer and fuck off.