The Young Ones, Series 2

Bambi:
So, your starter for ten, no conferring. Born in 1311 of Manchurian stock, he came to...

[Neil buzzes in]

Voice-over:
Scumbag, Neil.

Neil:
Er, can I go to the toilet, please?

Bambi:
No, I'm sorry, you're barking up the wrong tree there. Five-point penalty to Scumbag, full question to Footlights, no conferring. [continuing the question] He came to represent the modal cathodic slip-weight of the...

[Lord Monty buzzes in]

Voice-over:
Footlights, Monty.

Lord Monty:
Er, now, wasn't it, wasn't it Monk De Wally De Honk?

Bambi:
Yes, well you're almost there, can you give me any more?

Lord Monty:
Certainly, will £50 do?

Bambi:
Absolutely spot on. Well done, Footlights, ten points, and three bonus questions to you. What was the name of...

[Lord Snot buzzes in]

Lord Snot:
Battle of Bannockburn!

Bambi:
Yes, well that's very well anticipated there. Battle of Bannockburn it is.

[Neil buzzes in, almost falling out of his booth]

Neil:
Buzz, buzz, buzz... err, listen, sorry to hassle you or anything, Bambi, but I really do need to go to the toilet really badly, you know.

Bambi:
Yes, well the second bonus question for Footlights, leading by fifteen points, but it's early days yet.

Neil:
Oh no, guys, I'm just going to have to wee on Lord Snot's head.

[An appalled-looking Bambi looks up at Neil, then at the camera, before continuing]

Bambi:
Who said 'Lawks-a-lordy, my bottom's on fire'?

[Kendal Mintcake buzzes in]

Kendal Mintcake:
Lenin!

Bambi:
Yes, well I can accept that, though the exact answer was Joan of Arc. Well done, Footlights, five points. And what is the chemical equation for...

[Ms. Money-Sterling buzzes in]

Ms. Money-Sterling:
I've got a Porsche. Hee hee!

Bambi:
[pause] Yes, well that's not exactly what I've got written on the card, but I knew your father, so Footlights lead by 25 points.

Ms. Money-Sterling:
Daddy sends hugs. Hee hee!