ALF, Season 1

[ALF comes out of the car and finds it broken]

Lynn:
[finds the car that ALF crashed in the garage] ALF! ALF, are you okay?

ALF:
Don't worry, I'm fine. But this phone is a piece of junk. I'm gonna call Joel just as soon as he gets back from the Springs.

Willie:
Forget the phone, forget Joel. You've just crashed into our garage. For the second time, I might point out!

ALF:
I'm sorry, Willie, I really am. I think I might need glasses.

Willie:
Glasses? I think you might need a lawyer.

Kate:
Now, Willie, calm down.

Willie:
May I just say to you, think it's very irresponsible of you. To take the car out on the road like this. To endanger your life and the lives of others. And to make us worry. And this sort of thing seems to be repeating itself over and over again.

ALF:
There have been some fun times. Tell him, Kate.

Kate:
There have been some fun times. ALF, a lot of fun times, but this isn't one of them.

Willie:
Look at what you've done!

ALF:
Alright, alright, calm down. Don't worry about it, Willie. I'll pay for it.

Willie:
And how do you propose to do that?

ALF:
Well, I'll call Joel tomorrow, I'll sell the car, and we'll use the money to fix the garage.

Willie:
You'll do that? You'll call Joel?

ALF:
Well, actually, it'll be Joel's assistant, because as I have mentioned, Joel is in the Springs.

Kate:
That sounds fair, doesn't it, Willie?

Willie:
I suppose so. I suppose it does, ALF. I'm glad you weren't hurt.

ALF:
Thanks. Of course I'll want a complete physical before I sign anything. Just kidding, just kidding. [phone rings] That'll be Mrs. Ochmonek about the hedge.

Willie:
The hedge?

Kate:
[walks away] I'll get it.

Man:
Mr. Tanner!

ALF:
Uh, that'll be the people across the street. Does your insurance cover front porches?

Willie:
I'll be right back. Don't leave town. [leaves]

Lynn:
ALF, I don't think I can ever repay you for what you've done. What have you done?

ALF:
Well, I ran over a few front lawns, clipped a couple of jade trees. The rest is a blur.

Lynn:
I'd better go see if I can help out. [walks away]

ALF:
I think I'll turn in early tonight. [hides away inside the car when a light shines on him]