ALF, Season 1

ALF:
If anybody wants me, I'll be in the whirling hot tub.

Lynn:
We don't have a whirling hot tub.

ALF:
I know, I'm gonna improvise.

Lynn:
Any mail for me?

Kate:
Nope, sorry.

ALF:
Any mail for me?

Kate:
Yeah. All of it. [pause] But ALF, I don't want you joining anymore record clubs.

ALF:
Fine, fine, fine. Oh hey, before I forget, I need you to write out a couple of checks: One to Greenpeace and one to the auto club.

Lynn:
You're a member of the auto club?

ALF:
I like the magazine.

Kate:
Well, I'm not writing anymore checks.

ALF:
Well, fine, my checks just came. Oh darn, I ordered sunrise. They sent me sunset.

Kate:
Go take your bath.

ALF:
Fine. I wish these insurance companies would leave me alone. I'm already fully covered through the auto club. [leaves]

Kate:
I just know he's gonna get hair in the drain.

Lynn:
He was wearing a shower cap.

Kate:
Why was he carrying my mixer into the bathroom?

Lynn:
He said something about a whirling hot tub.

ALF:
[gets hurt offscreen] Whoa!

Kate:
ALF! [she and Lynn get up] Oh my gosh. [finds ALF walking to the living room] ALF? Are you alright?

ALF:
ALF? There must be some mistake. I'm Wayne Shagele, Michigan Life and Company. [nods his head]