Austin & Ally, Season 2

Dez:
Almost done... Voila!

Ally:
Amazing! It looks just like Austin!

Austin:
Except my hair's parted on the other side.

Dez:
Aw man! Guess I gotta start all over. [smashes pumpkin on the floor, walks off]

Dez:
Well, I do know one technique for dealing with anger. You write a message to the person you're upset with, tell them how you feel, then you get rid of that message, symbolically purging the negativity of your inner psyche.

Austin:
Okay, I'll give it a try. Dear Ally and Jimmy, I'm so... mad at you guys right now! I don't want anything to do with people who are... evil gutless rats!!

Dez:
Oh, that is good!

Trish:
Sorry I'm late for the Team Austin meeting!

Ally:
Actually, you're right on time. You see, I set your watch ahead 45 minutes, so you wouldn't be late.

Trish:
Aw man! That means I was on time for work too! That's why they didn't fire me...

Dez:
Shhh! Fine, we'll just keep this a secret between us.

Austin:
Keep what between us?

Trish:
Uh...Wha...Uh...Uh, this book! For now we'll just keep this book between us!

Megan:
O.M.G. Austin Moon; it's really you! [takes picture of him]

Dez:
Not now kid, we're waiting for a reporter from Cheetah Beat.

Megan:
I am the reporter. Megan Simms. [shakes hand with Austin]

Austin:
But you're like 5.

Megan:
I'm 10, and I don't usually get starstruck, but I am fuh-reaking! [takes another picture of Austin]

Dez:
Well, Austin Moon collects grizzly bears!

Austin:
It's teddy bears.

Trish:
I'll just fill this out for you. I'm used to making myself seem more impressive. How do you think I got my job as a lifeguard? I can't even swim!

Nelson:
I'll never smile again! [spots Megan] Hubba hubba! Hi, cutie! [coughs and makes his voice sound lower] I'm Nelson, heh heh.

Megan:
I'm flattered, but my career comes first.

Ally:
Dez! Get off the stage!

Dez:
But I've waited my whole life-

Ally:
[growls] Get off the stage.

Dez:
I can wait a little longer.

Austin:
This is crazy. It's like he's copying my whole life!

Ally:
Well, I wouldn't go that far...

Trent:
S'up losers! Meet T-Fame's new best bud: Dex! [does a bad version of What-Up handshake]

Ally:
Austin, we shouldn't rush into anything.

Austin:
I know, Ally. You're gonna say we should sit down and reason with him. Water the plant, people, and goodness will grow. Blah blah blah.

Ally:
No, I was going to say we shouldn't rush our revenge. I want to get this guy. We need to be ruthless. Plan every detail. Make no mistakes. I don't want to go back to jail! [Austin and Trish exchange glances] I saw that in a movie once...

Austin:
Ally, is this really happening?

Ally:
Believe it, Austin. It's real. Just like zebras.

Dez:
(Shakes his head doubtfully)

Ally:
(Staring at him strangely)

Austin:
Why are you staring at me like that?

Ally:
Oh, I started tearing up during your performance and my eyes froze open.

Austin:
(Waves his hand in front of her face)

Ally:
(Nods in confirmation)

Jimmy:
Sweetie!

Kira:
Daddy!

Ally:
Jimmy's Kira's dad?

Austin:
Aw man, you know what that means?

Dez:
She'll have a ride home after we fire her?

Trish:
No! It means we can't fire her!

Austin:
NOOOOOOOO!

Dez:
YESSSSSSSSS!

Jimmy:
Austin, I heard what happened.

Austin:
You did?

Jimmy:
How could you not tell me you have a drooling problem?

Austin:
What?

Jimmy:
Kira told me you drool. It's okay, son. I too was a drooler.

Austin:
Uh... Well... Then you must know. It's been hard.

Trish:
...So what'd I miss?

Austin:
Video Countdown Live is almost over, and still no sign of No Ordinary Day.

Ally:
That means No Ordinary Day is either number 1 or out of the Top Ten completely.

Dez:
We can't be out! Yesterday we were number four, the day before, number seven, before that it was five, four, eight, five, five-

Trish:
Dez!

Austin:
So Kira, I was maybe wondering if maybe you'd want to, you know, go out sometime? Like on a date?

Kira:
A date? Are you being serious?

Austin:
Huh, Not exactly the response I was looking for.

Kira:
No! Its just, I thought you and Ally liked each other.

Austin:
What? Me and Ally? Pssssh, no way!

Kira:
You sure? Because I've never seen a guy and girl spend so much time together that weren't boyfriend/girlfriend.

Austin:
Trust me. Ally and I are just friends. We like each other a lot, but not in that way!

Kira:
Alright, as long as there's nothing going on between you and Ally, I'll go out with you.

Ally:
I know you miss him, but part of growing up is learning to be your own best friend.

Dez:
You're right. I don't need Austin. I have myself, and that's enough.

Ally:
Good, now I'm going back-

Dez:
Don't leave me; myself's not enough!

Austin:
Hey Trish! Have you seen Ally?

Trish:
No, she's out with Elliot.

Austin:
Again? It's been three days. How long does it take to catch up with a guy?

Trish:
A regular looking guy: a day. A cutie like him: you may never see Ally again.

Penny:
Want to hear a story?

Ally:
Is it about a giraffe that's afraid of heights?

Penny:
This one's about a girl who was shy and insecure when her mom left home for Africa. But, when she returned, she found this confident, beautiful young woman who was capable of doing anything she put her mind to.

Ally:
[smiles]

Penny:
What's your biggest fear?

Ally:
Dez is gonna marry Trish and they'll wanna live with me.

Penny:
I meant, about your stage fright.

Ally:
That I'm gonna fail, and I'll never be a performer.

Penny:
So you try, and when you fail, get up and try again.

Trish:
Ally, we weren't really talking about the song, we were talking about you and Austin!

Ally:
[Sarcastically] Really? Look, I know he has feelings for me, but for all I know he still wants to be with Kira.

Trish:
Boo-hoo, he's going to have to deal with this at some point!

Ally:
Well I'm not sitting around waiting for him to decide who he wants to be with. My mom's coming home from Africa today and I just want to focus on her.

Trish:
Good for you, never wait on a guy. Actually, never wait on anybody, that's why I'm a terrible waitress.

Ally:
I'm going to forget about the whole Austin thing for now, honestly I am so over it. [Silence]. What do you think they're talking about in there? [Trish listens through the door] You hear anything?

Trish:
No, it's really quiet...

[Dez has his ear pressed against the door like Trish and Austin is standing behind him with his arms crossed just like Ally]

Dez:
It's really quiet...

Ally:
We kissed, it was good.

Austin:
Really good.

Ally:
Okay, really good.

Dez:
Magical even.

Ally:
It was really good and magical. But the point is, you chose Kira. So lets just stick to being friends and partners and pretend the kiss never happened.

Austin:
But I can't pretend that it never happened. Ally, I wanna be with you!

Austin:
So if I'm gonna get Ally to change her mind. I have to break up with Kira first. She's gonna be mad.

Dez:
Her dad won't be too happy, either.

Austin:
Yeah, he doesn't even know we're dating. Wait, that's it! If Jimmy finds out, maybe he'll do the breaking up for me.

Dez:
Mmmmm.

Austin:
Good idea, huh?

Dez:
No, I'm just enjoying my fry. Mmmmm.

Chuck:
My story's so short, you could see its feet on its driver's license.

Dez:
My story's so short, it's not allowed to go on any carnival rides.

Chuck:
My story's so short, when it sits on a dime, its feet don't touch the ground.

Dez:
My story's so short, that it's, um, that it's, uh, oh.

Dez:
My cake's so sweet, you get a cavity just by looking at it.

Chuck:
My cake's so sweet, my grandma wants to squeeze its cheeks every time she sees it.

Dez:
My cake's so sweet, instead of having a sweet sixteen party, girls have a my cake sixteen party.

Chuck:
Well my cake's so sweet, instead of having a sweet sixteen party, girls have a my cake sweet sixteen party. You already said that.

Dez:
Ha! Sweet, sweet victory. Or should I say, my cake, my cake victory?

Austin:
You rock at Clarinet Golf! Can I take you out to dinner to celebrate?

Ally:
Austin Monica Moon, are you asking me out on our first official date?

Austin:
Why yes I am, Ally I-don't-know-your-middle-name Dawson.

Ally:
I accept. And I am never telling you my middle name.

Trish:
With Dez's awesome directing and my amazing acting, we're gonna win.

Ally:
Did you just compliment Dez?

Trish:
Uh, whaaaaaaaat? You can't prove that.

Ally:
Or can I? ZALIEN BRAIN SUCK! [starts to do the action on Trish's head]

Dez:
Oh oh, Ally. Leave the brain-sucking to the pro's.

Austin:
[eats some chilli]

Dez:
[to Nelson] Any normal person who eats my chili will feel like their mouth is on fire.

Austin:
[begins panting and fanning his mouth]

Dez:
So they'll grab the fruit juice.

Austin:
[grabs the fruit juice, drinks it]

Dez:
But the acid in the fruit will just make it worse.

Austin:
[does a spit take]

Chuck:
My chili's so hot, you have to stick your own tongue in fire to cool it off.

Dez:
Oh yeah? Well, my chili's so hot that NASA uses it for rocket fuel.

Chuck:
My chili's so hot, it's the second leading cause of global warming.

Dez:
Well my chili's so hot, you have to put a smoke detector in your underwear before you eat it.

Chuck:
My chili's so hot that they're thinking about renaming the Sun "My Chili".

Dez:
Yeah? Well, my chili's so hot that... It...

Chuck:
What's the matter? Can't think of anything else? Don't feel bad- I also won 1st place in the Smack Talk Showdown.

Austin:
Ally, it seems like only yesterday, we were standing here, picking up the pieces of the cello bow that Dez and I broke.

Ally:
That was yesterday. And you still owe me $300 dollars for it!

Austin:
...Let's not live in the past!

Dez:
You need two things. The best Ally you can be, and boxing a kangaroo!

Ally:
How could it help me with the audition?

Dez:
I don't know, but guarantee your going to wow them!

Dez:
Well, that no-good hack wouldn't know talent if it hit him over the head!

Austin:
He signed me.

Dez:
That guy knows what he's doing.

Ally:
Are you guys putting salami on cereal?

Austin:
Yup. We couldn't decide if we wanted breakfast or lunch, so we're having both! We call it, blunch.

Dez:
Mhmmm. Frosted crispy bites and salami. Is there a better combination?

Ally:
How can you eat that?

Dez:
Oh, she's right! We forgot the mustard!

Trish:
So how's the new song coming?

Austin:
Great! I'm almost finished.

Dez:
Yup! Except for the music, the lyrics, and the song title, it's pretty much done.

Austin:
I can't take one of your songs.

Ally:
Austin, really. I want you to.

Austin:
No, really, I can't. These songs are too girly! Putting on my make-up for a night on the town. Crushing on a boy; I hope he's around.

Ally:
Yeah, it sounds better when I sing it.

Austin:
Kira, you sounded great.

Kira:
Thanks, Austin. That means a lot coming from you.

Austin:
[shrugs] Maybe we could work together someday.

Kira:
Maybe. I was really hoping I'd get to work with Ally. I'd really like to sing that song Ally wrote at my gig tomorrow night.

Jimmy:
Kira's first ever gig.

Kira:
I just wish I had that one great song to really put it over the top, Al-ly. A song that's already been written, Al-ly.

Ally:
Yeah, I'm not going to sell you my song.

Jimmy:
Austin, I want you back to Starr Records.

[Everyone gets happy, except Austin]

Austin:
Jimmy, wait. I don't want you take me back.

Trish:
[laughs nervously] Austin, what are you doing? [gives him a look]

Austin:
You keep saying, that you can't sign Ally, 'cause you don't want us in the same record label. So... take her instead of me.

Ally:
Austin, you don't have to do that for me.

Trish:
Next week you have a gig at the beach club, rehearsals with your dancers and 2 days in the studio.

Austin:
Yes!

Trish:
I know, you have a lot of exciting stuff next week.

Austin:
No... Yes! 'Cause I don't anything to do this week! I can have my first vacation all year!. This calls for a cocktail weenie.

Dez:
Wooh! Vacation! I say we go to the beach every day, play video games and sleep in till noon.

Austin and Dez:
What up!

Ally:
You realize you still have school, right?

Austin:
Awe... Thanks for ruining my vacation.

Austin:
I love being on a vacation.

Dez:
Too bad it's been raining or we could've gone to real beach to see real beach babes.

Austin:
Don't worry. I made some calls. [Two girls enters Sonic Boom] Hello, ladies. Oooh I love my life.

Dez:
I love your life too.

Austin:
Can one of you put sunblock on me?

Dez:
I'm on it buddy.

[Girls leaves]

Austin:
Dez! I wanted the beach babes to do it!

Dez:
With their little hands it would've taken forever!

[After the performance]

Trish:
Well, there's your proof, Sir.

Val:
That he's a great singer and dancer? We knew that already!

Trish:
No. Now we know who Austin wrote this song about.

Judge:
We do?

Trish:
Yes! When he sang, he looked at every girl in the room. Except one. There's an obvious explanation. It was too emotional to him. Austin wrote this song about Ally!

[Everyone on court are shocked; Dez look at Ally with shocked face]

Ally:
Austin, is it true? You wrote it about me?

Austin:
Yeah... It's true. I should have told you earlier, but I couldn't. You told me to write about someone I care about and... That's you.

Ally:
Do you still have feelings for me?

Austin:
Psss... No... Yes... I-I don't know... All I know that I love being friends with you, and I don't wanna ruin that. That's why I couldn't say it was about you.

Judge:
Awww!

[Austin and Ally gives him a look]

Ally:
I get it. I'm glad that we're just friends, but... I kinda hoped that it was about me.

Dez and Trish:
Awww!

[Ally gives them a look]

Austin:
[holds Ally's hands and plays the keyboard] So this is a C chord. And this is a D chord. With a little practice you... [Ally plays at the keyboard] totally don't need my help!

Ally:
Wow! What the heck was that?

Austin:
That was you rocking at the keyboard.

Ally:
I guess I've always had this music in me and just needed you to bring it out.

Austin:
Now just write a song. First, we have to come with some chords.

Ally:
Um... Like this? [plays the keyboard]

Austin:
That's great! Now we've gotta come up with some words.

Ally:
I got it! [plays the keyboard] Dance, dance, dance, dance...

Austin:
It can't just be any word. They have to come from your heart. What's the last powerful emotion you've experienced?

Ally:
Love.

Austin:
[blushes] Really?

Ally:
Yeah, I was... Sitting next to you and the keyboard and I thought... Man... I really love the new seat cushion I bought. It's so comfy!

Austin:
[Takes cushion] Ok... Let's go with love then. What's great about love?

Ally:
Um... It doesn't end over time. It's timeless.

Austin:
[sing and play the keyboard] This love is never gonna fade, we're timeless, we're timeless.

Ally:
That's incredible! Where did you learn how to writes songs that way?

Austin:
A good friend taught me.

Ally:
Was it Trish?

Austin:
No... Here, c'mon. [grabs her arm to the keyboard]

Trish:
Guess who made cookies for the basketball team?

Ally:
Ooh, and they're manatee-shaped. That's nice of you.

Trish:
I had no choice. Darcy Pivnicks made cupcakes for the football team. There's no way I'm going to lose to that goodie-two-shoes.

Ally:
That's the spirit. [bites into a cookie] This tastes horrible.

Trish:
Yeah, I ran out of sugar, so I just used sand.

Trish:
(unenthusiastic) Yippee, School, Rah-Rah-Rah.

Ally:
You know they're giving 1000 bucks to the person who shows the most spirit, right?

Trish:
(enthusiastic) Yippee! School! Rah-Rah-Rah! Gooooo Mustang!

Austin:
We're the Manatees!

Ally:
Thanks for carrying me, Austin.

Austin:
I wouldn't have to if you took off your shoes!

Ally:
But they're so pretty...

Ally:
Hi, I'm Ally. It's nice to meet you.

Austin:
That's how you greet a legendary rockstar?

Ally:
Uh, sorry. It's very nice to meet you.

Chuck:
You're going to pay for this, Red! You too, Blondie! And you too...whatever color your hair is.

Ally:
I didn't have anything to do with it! And it's chestnut with amber highlights.

Ally:
[to the phone trying to pretend zombie] MUST EAT BRAINS!

Austin:
Really? That's the best you can do?

Austin and Ally:
doing the handshake "What up?!"

Dez:
"Dude, that's our thing!"

Austin:
"Sorry Dez, I just got excited."

Austin and Dez:
Doing the handshake "What up?"

Dez:
"That's better"

Austin:
Well, we know who's not getting picked.

Ally:
We choose Lucy!

Lucy:
Seriously?!

Jett:
Seriously?

Trish and Dez:
Seriously?

Val and Jean Paul:
Seriously?

Austin:
Seriously?

Austin:
[Stops kissing] A-A-Ally I'm so sorry I met with another songwriter. I knew your career was taking off and I'd thought you'd leave me.

Ally:
Aww Austin, I'll always be here for you. I'm sorry I ever doubted our partnership. It's the best thing that ever happened to me.

Austin:
So we're good?

Ally:
[Nods] Yeah.

Trish:
Uh uh um. Sorry to interrupt your moment, but what the heck was the kiss all about?

Ally:
[Both Stammer] Uh... It's called acting?

Dez:
Yeah, that was a lot more than just acting. [Mimicks Ally]

Austin:
I told you we can be professional. It was for the movie, man.

Ally:
Yeah, just for the movie man. [Stammers again] You're a really good actor Austin.

Austin:
You too, Ally. Huh huh huh. Goodbye.

Ally:
Yeah. [Both run off in opposite directions]

Dez:
I don't know Trish. We shot dozens of scenes already. Trust me. Neither one of them is that good of an actor.

Dez:
Good morning, actors! Nothing like a good night's sleep to help you forget all the reasons why you're mad at someone.

Ally:
I haven't forgotten. I'm still mad at him for meeting with another songwriter.

Austin:
And I'm still mad at her for not wanting to be my partner!

Dez:
Hm... So, what I'm hearing is, you both didn't get enough sleep.

Trish:
You guys better snap out of this. I promised Jimmy Starr a rockumentary, not a you-guys-are-both-acting-like-spoiled-brats-umentary.

Dez:
Yeah, how am I gonna fit that on the poster?

Trish:
Let's just rehearse. We're gonna read through the next scene, then shoot it.

Dez:
[starts reading from the screenplay] "Fade in. Ally's charity event is about to be a total bust when Austin rushes in to save the day. Ally hurries over with gratitude in her eyes. [whispers] And, action, Ally...

Ally:
[reading from her script in monotone] "Thank you for saving me, Austin. Thank you, thank you, thankyou" [glares at Austin] Do we really need dialogue here? Sometimes a look says all the words for you.

[Austin and Ally exchange dirty looks]

Dez:
Yeah, that look says a lot of words I can't put in the movie. It's a family film.

Austin:
What scene are you gonna do?

Dez:
We're gonna shoot the scene where you guys have one day to write a song.

Austin:
You mean for the Helen show?

Dez:
No.

Ally:
You mean for Austin's first performance in the mall?

Dez:
No.

Austin:
You mean for the Hot Summer Jam contest?

Dez:
No.

Ally:
You mean for the time when we--

Dez:
--Man, there are a lot of times you guys only have one day to write a song.

Trish:
Yeah. When this movie is over, we really need to work on your time management.

Ally:
But I don't wanna miss going on Austin's tour. I'm his songwriter. Being apart will affect how we feel about each other... [Trish gives a look] S-Songs.

Trish:
Wait. Is this about being his songwriter or being his something else?

Ally:
Whaaaaaat? [Trish gives a look] Uh, okay fine, I-I like Austin and I'm pretty sure he likes me. I'm afraid if I don't go on this tour with him everything is gonna be different when he gets back. Feelings can change in three months.

Austin:
Gonna miss you.

Ally:
I'm gonna miss you too.

Austin:
We shouldn't be sad. You're making a record! I'm so proud of you.

Ally:
I know. And you're going on your first tour. And hey, we'll only be apart for like three months.

Austin:
Actually, it's 94 days. [thinks] Hey, ninety-four. That's like with Dez--

Ally:
Don't say it. I guess it's goodbye. Have fun on tour.

Austin:
Good luck making your record. I know it's gonna be great. [the two hug]

Austin:
[runs off bus] Ally, wait!

Ally:
Austin, what are you do--

Austin:
Ally, I just wanted to say that I... Uh, I.. Here. [gives her a card] It says it all in there. I was gonna send it to you in case you didn't show up.