Highlander: The Series, Season Three

Charlie DeSalvo:
You got a visitor.

Duncan MacLeod:
But I'm not even here yet.

Duncan:
Walk out that door and you won't know if this is the right place or not.

Duncan:
I've gotta go to Japan.

Charlie:
Japan?

Duncan:
Yeah, you know. Land of the Rising Sun. Hai!

Charlie:
You just got back!

Duncan:
That was Paris. It's a different continent.

Charlie:
Very funny, MacLeod.

Duncan:
I'll give you the air miles.

Charlie:
How long have you been gone?

Duncan:
Six months.

Charlie:
Yeah right, so for six months, everything is quiet. I don't even get a hangnail. And all of a sudden you show up and I'm fighting to save my teeth.

Duncan:
Don't thank me all at once, Charlie.

Duncan:
Sometimes it's not the body you have to protect... it's the spirit.

[Flashback to Japan, 1778]

Duncan:
But there must be some other way! We can get a boat and leave Japan...

Hideo Koto:
I could no more run than I could fly. Koto is a noble Samurai name... a name I have been honored to borrow. To dishonor it for all who follow me would be unthinkable.

Duncan MacLeod:
Let me know when you've found the formula.

Richie:
The formula?

Duncan:
For getting in shape without training.

Duncan:
Immortals can't have children.

Richie:
Exactly Mac, this happened before I became an immortal.

Duncan:
That's not the way it works.

Richie:
Maybe I'm the first.

Duncan:
I wish it could happen. But it's not in the cards. We don't get to live happily ever after. Children aren't part of our lives...it can't happen.

Richie:
It just did.

Father Matthew:
Ah, Paris... The city of my youth. I was there in '72. What a summer. [remembering] All those women, all that wine... Of course, that was before I entered the priesthood.

Duncan and Richie:
Of course.

Richie:
I didn't know if I'd find you alive. What the hell happened?

Duncan:
I lived.

Richie:
Very funny. And the other guy?

Duncan:
He lived too.

Joe:
Hey MacLeod, what do you think? Is it me?

Duncan:
The truth? I'd say it's a little out of character.

Joe:
You know, I wasn't born in a museum. In fact, I'm kinda tired of hanging around old antiques like you. Look at me, I'm growing old.

Duncan:
I think you need some oil and vinegar.

Richie:
I'm lucky I didn't need a funeral.

Anne Lindsey:
[to Paul Karros] You can be St. Francis of Assisi... and I still would not let you to turn my hospital into a zoo.[to Reporters] Now ladies and gentlemen, it's a bit early for Happy Hour so please go!

Anne:
I said everybody.

Duncan MacLeod:
Oh, you mean me?

Anne:
Unless you're the one with the special dispensation from the Pope.

Duncan:
Must've left it in my other pants.

Anne:
We have a wonderful hearing specialist upstairs, you want a referral?

Duncan:
Pardon?

Anne:
Forget it. Get out, go!

Charlie DeSalvo:
[to MacLeod] It's funny. This time I'm the one leaving with the girl, and you're stuck here running the dojo.

Duncan MacLeod:
Joe, I want you to meet Amanda. Amanda... Joe Dawson.

Joe The Amanda..? You know, I've heard an awful lot about you.

Amanda:
I'll bet you have. I hear you're one of those guys who likes to watch.

Joe:
It's clinical. For history. We don't get involved.

Amanda:
Well, tell me... Do you watch us do... everything?

Joe:
Only the things I can't get arrested for.

Amanda:
[to MacLeod] I like this guy.

Amanda:
I've lived a long time, Joe. What goes around comes around.

Joe:
You really believe that's true?

Amanda:
I believe it should be.

Duncan:
[to Thorne] Murdering a priest is an interesting way to find religion.

Duncan:
I need you to help me break into the museum.

Amanda:
You want me to WHAT?! I knew you were up to something. For three hundred years you've been telling me to go legit. Now that I'm straight, you want me to steal.

Duncan:
You hate your job.

Amanda:
That's not the point.

Duncan:
In a good cause.

Amanda:
Don't you look at me like that. No, I'm retired. You wouldn't ask an alcoholic to take a drink for a good cause.

Duncan:
You can't kill him with that, Joe.

Joe:
I know, but I can sure as hell slow him down until I can.

Duncan:
You won't get close enough to use it. Let me do this... For both of us.

Amanda:
Did you know he could do that?

Duncan:
No. [with irony] You know, It's funny. The man knows more about me than anyone else alive, yet I hardly know anything about him..

Amanda:
God, to sing like that...he must have had a helluva life.

Duncan:
Probably...

Amanda:
You want to ask him about it?

Duncan:
No... when he's ready, he'll tell me.

Michelle Webster:
Whoa, hold up, time out! That was the morgue. I was in the morgue!

Duncan MacLeod:
Keep your voice down.

Michelle:
Why?

Duncan:
Because we are sneaking out of here!

Michelle:
No, I mean, why was I in there?

Duncan:
Don't worry, you're not dead.

Michelle:
Oh, gee, thanks. That explains it.

Michelle:
You mean I'm never going to turn nineteen?

Duncan:
But you might get to see a thousand.

Michelle:
You do know I've always had a thing for you. Since the first time I laid eyes on you.

Duncan:
You were eleven years old!

Michelle:
I matured early.

Michelle:
Oh, so is that what you guys do? Run around chopping each other's heads off?

Duncan:
Until there's only one of us left alive.

Michelle:
I don't think so.

Duncan:
Michelle, I'm not your father and this isn't a fairy tale! Now you either learn the Game, or you die.

Michelle:
You know, Duncan, you really have a gift for taking the fun out of eternal life.

Duncan:
It'll get better.

Michelle:
I sure hope so.

Duncan:
No, I mean your... outlook.

Michelle:
Oops. Almost slipped. You were gonna say "attitude".

Michelle:
You know what, Duncan? That is "Dad speak". And you're pretty lousy at that too.

Duncan MacLeod:
This doesn't make any sense, Richie, he's supposed to be getting married.

Richie:
Not unless it's a shotgun wedding. I'm telling you, Mac, she didn't want anything to do with him.

Richie:
Mac, you don't understand, one minute the guy was there, and the next, boom, he's trying to take my head. And he wasn't kidding around. I mean, that girl came in, and he just freaked. He totally lost it. Now what the hell is this all about?

Jill:
We were happy. Everything seemed so perfect. Then one day I came home and he said "Honey, come here, I have something to show you." And then he took a knife, and he .... [she can't say it]

Duncan:
Then he healed.

Jill:
He said I had to know... and I wish he'd never told me.

Duncan:
He loves you. He had to tell you.

Jill:
Mr. MacLeod, I have a picture of how I want my life to be. Kids, grandkids... a family. It may sound stupid, but it's what I see.

Richie:
So you called it off.

Jill:
But he won't let me. And he won't leave me alone. He nearly beat a guy to death just for talking to me.

Anne Lindsey:
This is ridiculous. I'm calling the police.

Duncan:
Anne, don't.

Anne:
It is the only way, Duncan. You think talking is going to stop this guy? If you think that, spend a Saturday night in the emergency ward with me. These guys do not stop until someone's dead.

Duncan MacLeod:
Joe? What's up?

Joe:
You've got trouble.

Duncan:
How come you never call with good news?

Duncan:
Come on, Joe. Methos doesn't exist.He's a legend... like Adam and Eve. The oldest Immortal.

Joe:
Oh, he exists all right.

Duncan:
Are you telling me you've seen him?

Joe:
Me? No. He's an elusive guy. Have to be, to live as long as he has. An Immortal so old he doesn't remember the time of his birth.

Duncan:
Five thousand years.

Methos:
Yeah, give or take. And that was when I took my first head. Before that, it all starts to blur.

Duncan:
I guess it would. So, after all this time, have You... ?

Methos:
Made any sense of it all? Found any purpose?

Duncan:
You read minds, too?

Methos:
No. It's what I'd ask if I'd just met me.

Duncan:
Somehow I thought you'd be...

Methos:
Deeper? Wiser? Bearded?

Duncan:
I didn't really think you existed.

Methos:
Ah, it's good to be a myth.

Duncan:
Yeah, no one hunts for a myth. Or a Watcher.

Methos:
What better place to hide? I'm in charge of finding myself...and I make sure it never happens.

Methos:
You think I'd still be around if I was an easy mark?

Duncan:
When was the last time you faced anyone?

Methos:
What are we? [checking his watch] Sixth of March, uh, two hundred years. Hey, I may be a bit rusty but I'm still here.

Methos:
You think I wanna die? Do you think it's easy after thousands of years?

Duncan:
So after five thousand years, your only solution is that I kill you?

Methos:
He can beat me. He might beat you. He can't beat both of US.

Duncan:
If it's that simple, why don't you take my head?

Methos:
'Cause it's not just a matter of who is the best fighter. It is about passion and hate. I don't have the fire. You do. You want Kalas.

Methos:
Live, Highlander. Grow stronger...fight another day.

Duncan MacLeod:
You've killed two already. How much is enough?

Ceirdwyn:
There were five of them.

Duncan:
This isn't the answer.

Ceirdwyn:
A body for a body. A head for a head. Since the dawn of time. It's no different now.

Duncan:
Revenge does nothing, Ceirdwyn... nothing.

[Speaking to her husband's grave]

Ceirdwyn:
I did what I had to do... But you'd think, after all this time, I would have learned... Death is always death. And when someone's gone, nothing can bring them back. Not pain, not rage... not revenge.

[About her dead (mortal) husband]

Duncan:
You going to be OK?

Ceirdywn:
No, not for a long time... I'm not going to forget him, you know? But it was worth it. For the fifteen years we had together, I'll trade fifteen years of pain. I'd trade a hundred!

Duncan:
But what about the price they pay? No family, living in secrecy... waiting for the night you go out and you never come back. Maybe we're not supposed to be with them.

Ceirdwyn:
They're not children, MacLeod. They make their own decisions. Steven knew what I was, and he chose to be with me.

[Anne examines a Scottish broadsword]

Anne Lindsey:
You fought the battle of Culloden with this? That was in 1746.

Duncan MacLeod:
I know, it's hard to accept. I thought coming here might help. That was a gift from Bonnie Prince Charlie. I claimed it after he died.

Anne:
It's like a fairy tale, with swords and people living forever.

Duncan:
Not always.

Anne:
That's right, the heads. Do you really have to do that?

Duncan:
Yeah.

Anne:
Duncan, I've seen death. And I'm not afraid of it. Whatever happens, I want us to be together.

Duncan:
Your whole life will never be the same.

Anne:
My whole life has not been the same since the day I met you. I tried it with you. I've tried it without you. I'll take it with you any day.

Kristov:
I'll kill you in a second, boy. Leave while you've still got your head.

Richie:
There's only one thing I hate more than being called a "boy". And that's your stupid paintings.

[They fight]

Richie:
I'd kiss you, but people might talk.

Duncan:
They might.

Anne:
So, is this the way it's always going to be?

Duncan:
I don't know. I can't see into the future. Can you live with it?

Anne:
I don't know. But I'd really like to try.

Duncan MacLeod:
Amanda?

Amanda:
Gotta hand it to you, MacLeod...You've got a memory like an elephant.

Duncan:
Amanda, what are you doing here? Besides making a fashion statement.

Amanda:
You like it?... I'm making you dinner...

Duncan:
Come on, Amanda, give. What do you really want?

Amanda:
Just to make you happy.

Duncan:
Why?

Amanda:
So you won't kill me when I tell you what happened.

Duncan:
What the hell are you doing here?

Amanda:
Came to hear some jazz.

Duncan:
Jazz.

Amanda:
You know, American music. Miles, Coltrane, Wynton...[off his look] Alright, I was looking for you. [his look doesn't change] Alright, I was looking for Kalas! You know you can really be irritating sometimes?

Joe:
That went well. What the hell were you thinking of?

Methos:
I wasn't thinking, I was improvising.

Joe:
By cutting yourself open? And it took you five thousand years to figure that out.

Methos:
You're disappointed in me, aren't you? Gimme a break. What were you expecting? Einstein? Freud? Buddha?

Joe:
Forget it.

Methos:
Sorry, Joe. I'm just a guy.

Amanda:
It's morning. I'm tired. It's hopeless. We'll never find him. Our only lead back to Kalas and you had to kill him.

Duncan:
I told you, I didn't kill him. He fell.

Amanda:
On his gun?

Duncan:
Yes!

Amanda:
And it went off just like that.

Duncan:
Just like that.

Methos:
Well. Life as we know it is over.

Amanda:
Remember when Gustave Eiffel built this thing?

Duncan MacLeod:
World's Fair, 1889. Half the people thought it would ruin Paris forever. There were fist-fights all along the Champs Elysees.

Amanda:
Now you can't imagine Paris without it.

Methos:
I've got a lot to offer. Five thousand years of history, Joe...I was there.

Joe:
History's been written. People have been known to kill the messenger who waltzes in with a new version of the truth.

Methos:
Why would I tell the truth?

Amanda:
C'mon, MacLeod... Haven't you ever wanted to do something really crazy?

Duncan:
Amanda, be careful. We don't fly.

Amanda:
Have you ever tried? Relax. Whatever happens, I'll survive.

Kalas:
MacLeod. It seems you're always a day late and a dollar short.

Amanda:
You should have killed him. You had him... I can't believe you let him go!

Duncan:
It's not that simple, Amanda...

Amanda:
I'll tell you what's simple. Dead is simple.

Methos:
I was in Rome once. 93 A.D., the Coliseum... I saw Christians facing the lions. Some of them looked almost happy to die for their faith.

Duncan:
Your point? Or are you just strolling down Memory Lane here?

Methos:
But afterwards, the only ones looking happy were the lions

Duncan:
This isn't about faith.

Methos:
No, it's about sacrifice. It's a helluva thing to be a martyr, MacLeod... And that's exactly what Kalas wants. He's pushing all your buttons.

Duncan:
Well, I'm open to suggestions. Enlighten me.

Methos:
Maybe Amanda's right. You fight your best fight.

Duncan:
[sarcastic] What? Every man for himself and to hell with the rest?

Methos:
So what if the world finds out? Life's about change. Civilizations rise and fall.

Duncan:
This isn't about civilization, this is about people! Amanda, Dawson, Richie... Our world isn't an ant farm.

Methos:
[with a touch of admiration and humor] The passion of youth.

Duncan:
[with a sense of humor] Boys will be boys.

Methos:
And every cloud has a silver lining.

Duncan:
What do you mean?

Methos:
If you die, Amanda will be free to date.

Duncan:
That's a comfort.