Ninjago, Season 15: Crystalized

[Cole, Kai and Zane arrive at the lighthouse. Cole knocks on the door. They gasp when they see who opens the door]

Kai:
Jay? What happened to your face?

Jay:
Time, ravages us all.

Kai:
Uh, Jay, why are there half full water glasses everywhere?

Jay:
They're half empty.

Cole:
Okay, but why?

Jay:
So I can talk to Nya. [the others gasp] Nya became one with the ocean, remember? Which means she's connected to all water everywhere. Which means part of Nya is inside that water glass. And that one, and that one, and that one, and th⁠—

Kai:
Okay, okay, okay. We get it.

Jay:
[to a glass of water] Nya, the guys are here. What? Oh, okay. I'll tell them. She says, "Hi."

Lloyd:
I'm gonna need you at Kryptarium to help us get past those new thermal sensors.

Zane:
What about Nya? Nobody else can keep her frozen.

Skylor:
[enters] You sure about that?

Kai:
[surprised] Skylor?

Lloyd:
I called her.

Kai:
You had her number?!

[The ninja speed through the city on new vehicles]

Jay:
These... are awesome! Why are they transporting the artifacts anyway?

Kai:
Probably because we asked the Mayor about Aspheera's staff.

Jay:
Oh! Oh, right.

Kai:
Wow, I love this thing!

Cole:
That's what I'm talking about!

Lloyd:
How did you build these so fast, P.I.X.A.L.?

P.I.X.A.L.:
A Nindroid needs her secrets.

Zane:
I find this very illogical. We will need a thorough download at a suitable time.

[In the courtyard, Aspheera and Wu lift weights]

Aspheera:
98, 99, 100. I win!

Wu:
Well, I am thousands of years old.

Aspheera:
So am I. Next contest!

[In the game room, they arm wrestle. Aspheera wins]

Aspheera:
Yes! Such a Wu-ser! It's like loser but with "Wu" in it, as that's your name!

Wu:
Are we done?

Aspheera:
Not even close!

[The ninja are taken to their cells in Kryptarium Prison]

Kai:
I can't believe it. After all we've done for Ninjago.

Jay:
Oh, this is bad! This is really bad! Do you know how many people in here probably hate us?

Inmate:
All of us!

Jay:
Eh, hey, roomies.

Zane:
It would appear there are only four beds, but five of us.

Kai:
That's the least of our problems.

Cole:
Yeah. I don't think I'm gonna be sleeping much.

Zane:
If you are certain, I will take a bunk.

Cole:
Huh?

Jay:
How can you be so calm about this?!

Lloyd:
You know full well he turned off his emotion meter, Jay.

Jay:
Well, it’d be nice to get a human reaction once in a while!

Zane:
If it would make you feel better, I can switch it on again and react appropriately.

Kai:
It might, actually.

[Zane turns his emotion meter on and starts screaming]

Cole:
[turns it back off] Not helping.

Fugi-Dove:
Well, well, if it isn't my arch-nemesis, Jay! The ninja of lightning!

Jay:
Sorry, have we met?

Fugi-Dove:
Oh, you probably don't recognize me in my prison clothes. It is I, Fugi-Dove! [coos twice] My cry fills the night?

Fugi-Dove:
What happened to you, Jay?

Jay:
What do you mean?

Fugi-Dove:
Why have you turned to a life of crime? And what does this mean for our long-standing rivalry? And how can we be enemies if we're both criminals? You're messing everything up!

Jay:
First, I'm not turning to a life of crime! Second, there is no rivalry, and third, you're weird. Stop talking to me.

Fugi-Dove:
You're avoiding the subject, Jay!

Jay:
What subject?!

Fugi-Dove:
How to repair our relationship in the wake of you becoming a criminal!

Jay:
I'm not becoming a criminal!

Fugi-Dove:
If you're really set on this, here's some free advice. Get a cool villain name! Like mine! But different, because I already have mine.

Jay:
A villain name, great, thanks.

Fugi-Dove:
Like "The Jay-ler"! Because your name is Jay, get it? And then get some chains so you can smash stuff.

[Dareth takes off his disguise]

Cole:
Dareth! I knew it was you!

Lloyd:
I thought you said you had one last strategy, Dareth.

Dareth:
This is it! A strategy called breaking you out!

Kai:
Please tell me you brought a change of clothes!

Dareth:
Sure did! It's in a box behind the seat. Complements of P.I.X.A.L.. I have no idea how she makes this stuff so fast!

[Just then, Fugi-Dove pops up from under the clothes]

Fugi-Dove:
Did you bring one for me, Dareth?

Jay:
What are you doing here?

Fugi-Dove:
You're new at being a criminal. You'll need my criminal guidance if you have any hope of succeeding in your criminal plot!

Jay:
Would you stop saying criminal?!

Kai:
Anyone have any idea where we are?

Fugi-Dove:
[pops up] Not a clue!

Jay:
[shocked] Wha - where - how?!

Fugi-Dove:
I am like the dove. Quick! Silent! Deadly!

Jay:
Doves aren't deadly!

Fugi-Dove:
Maybe not the doves you know.

Jay:
None of them are deadly! Doves are a symbol of peace and love!

Fugi-Dove:
My cry fills the night! [coos twice]

Jay:
[aggravated] Will you please SHUT UP?!

[In the desert, Kai, Zane, and Dareth are walking, exhausted]

Dareth:
So ... you're not ... thirsty at all?

Zane:
No. Being a Nindroid is not without benefits.

Dareth:
I wish I were a Nindroid.

Kai:
Say, did you turn your emotions back on?

Zane:
I did indeed.

Kai:
And why is that?

Zane:
I realized there is a benefit to them, even grief.

Kai:
There's hope for you yet, Zane.

Aspheera:
You're not the Crystal King?

Kabuki Mask:
I am merely his herald. I prepare the way, I do his bidding.

Vangelis:
Like a servant?

Kabuki Mask:
You should watch your tone, Vangelis. You have me to thank for those shiny new wings. Or perhaps you'd rather reconsider and have us send you back to where we found you?

Aspheera:
What does this Crystal King want from us?

Kabuki Mask:
He will reveal his plan in time. But this, is not the time. Unfortunately, it seems we have an imposter among us.

Pythor:
What?! Where!?

Lloyd:
[dressed as the Mechanic, visibly nervous] Who?

Aspheera:
[points at Vangelis] It's you!

Vangelis:
How DARE you?!

Aspheera:
You're the only one wearing a mask!

Vangelis:
Are you blind?! [points at Mr. F] So is he!

[Mr. F glares at Vangelis]

P.I.X.A.L.:
Dr. Borg!

Cyrus Borg:
P.I.X.A.L.! And... friends? What are you doing here?

P.I.X.A.L.:
We require your assistance.

Cyrus Borg:
Oh, well, you're in luck! I've been up all night, working on a new line of mechs and... eh, wait. Help with what?

[P.I.X.A.L. picks up a remote and opens the blinds, showing Borg the invasion outside]

Cyrus Borg:
Perhaps I need to take more frequent breaks.

Kai:
Y'know, we do make a pretty good team. So, uh ... guess it's about time we made it official. We'll be a couple from now on, cool?

Skylor:
Are you serious?

Kai:
Uh... uh... yeah?

Skylor:
Well, great timing, Kai! You disappear for ages and I don't hear from you like I've been forgotten. Then out of nowhere, during the biggest crisis ever, you spring this couple stuff on me?

Kai:
[sighs] Sorry. My elemental powers were stolen, and then I was trapped in this icy realm, and then I got stuck inside a video game, and wound up on this mountain with an evil king with a talking skull. And then my sister got turned into the ocean, so... yeah. It's been kinda weird.

Skylor:
How about we save Ninjago first, then maybe we talk about us?